Biden Calls Ryan’s Mother to Apologize For Ass-Kicking

Oct 11, 2012

100323_biden11_ap_392_regularU.S. Vice-President Joe Biden has called Republican VP nominee Paul Ryan's mother to apologize for the vicious ass-kicking he gave her son in Thursday night's debate.

The fiery match between the two men featured 69-year old Biden schooling 42-year old Ryan on Afghanistan, Medicare, taxes, and the economy. 

The smackdown was so complete that a snap poll conducted by TDC News showed that 78% of undecided voters felt "embarrassed" for Ryan and 69% thought future debates should include a "mercy rule".

Biden decided to made the conciliatory call while on an Amtrack train back to Washington. A reporter travelling with the Vice-President recorded the conversation, and released the tape exclusively to The Daily Currant:

"Hi Betty it's Joe. I just called to apologize for what I did to your son tonight."

"You and I both know I had to kick his ass. It's my job. But I didn't have to embarrass him like a little bitch in front of 50 million people. I got a little carried away. I'm sorry."

"I think little Paulie has a lot potential. Have him call me in a few years when he's ready to debate like a man."

"Oh and I uh...I hope this doesn't affect our relationship. We're still on for Boca next March right?...Fantastic!"


  • Starsky

    Um, Biden just came off like a douchebag honestly. The idea that him & Benjamin Netanyahu are good friends? He really thinks that Mitt Romney believes that soldiers fighting in Afghanistan are moochers of the 47%???

  • nose2grindstone

    In fact, many of them end up falling into the group that pays no federal income taxes. It’s such broad brush strokes that force the American people to realize they can’t trust R&R–which is exactly what they’ll get a lot of come the second week of November.

  • Mitt Romney said, point blank, that people who don’t pay federal income taxes “refuse to take responsibility for their lives,” and cannot be persuaded to vote for him. That includes soldiers in combat zones, FOX News-watching Social Security collectors, kids fresh out of high school / college who can only find part-time employment…

    Mitt painted with such a broad brush, no wonder he got some paint on himself.