Tea Party Trashes Boehner’s Capitol Hill Office

Jan 07, 2013

li-boehner-620-01043246Conservative members of the Tea Party raided House Speaker John Boehner's office over the weekend, destroying several thousand dollars worth of property and leaving behind giant bags of tea.

Capitol Hill police were at first stumped as to how the intruders gained entry, but soon came to realize that the incident had been an 'inside job' perpetrated by fellow members of Congress.

Representatives Louie Gohmert, Steve Pearce, Tom Massie, and Ted Yoho are suspected of carrying out the vicious teabagging, but a spokesperson from Boehner's office says he will not be filing charges in the name of  "party unity".

Witnesses at the scene describe Boehner's office as "completely destroyed", with smashed picture frames, soiled carpet, and "shreds of paper and tea leaves everywhere." On the walls were several Tea Party slogans written in graffiti, including:

"TAXES ARE YUCKY"

"COMPROMISE IS FOR SOCIALISTS"

"WHERE'S THE BIRTH CERTIFICATE?"

"NANCY PELOSI HAS COOTIES"

"JUSTIN AMASH WAS HERE"

Boehner was narrowly re-elected Speaker last week with significant numbers of conservative Republicans affiliated with the Tea Party voting against him.

Several prominent conservative activists have called for his resignation, arguing his willingness to compromise over the fiscal cliff tax hikes makes him insufficiently conservative to hold the post of speaker.


  • Jane Hawes

    “Nancy Pelosi has cooties”? How old are those guys, thirteen?

  • Whitney Robinson

    “…he will not be filing charges in the name of party unity.” Unless, of course, Dems were involved, then he’d feel a need to broaden, not narrow, the already unbridgeable divide in congress.

  • Charles Jensen

    Taxpayers will be paying for the clean up. Boehner needs to file charges and seek restitution.

  • jeff725

    Bill Maher: Republicans are children:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T0abS0IdQtA

  • http://twitter.com/damspahn Dam Spahn

    Teathugs in Congress destroying public property? No charges? That’s why they do it. Everyone’s afraid of these punks. It will only get worse. They should be caught, impeached, and sent home, without benefits.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Bill-Healy/100000675547280 Bill Healy

    Are you sure they were teabaggers? Those slogans all look like they were spelled correctly.

  • theoracle

    Sounds like Tea Party terrorists. IOW, they sent a “message” to Boehner that if they can get into his office to trash it, then they can access his office anytime they want, and the next time they might not be so “friendly” and unarmed.

  • http://twitter.com/sandyknauer Sandy Knauer

    Who wrote this and where did s/he get the info? Inquiring minds want to know.

  • irish

    The question is, why doesn’t some taxpayer press charges? I thought we owned this building and all in it. Yes, it’s simplistic, but wth? There has to be some consequences to their actions.

  • http://www.facebook.com/tracey.olmoz Tracey Francis Olmoz

    You all know this is satire, right? Like a cousin of The Onion…

  • Skip

    Nah, 13 yr olds today have no idea what “cooties” are, sad to say!

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=722603934 Doug Patterson

    Trolled softly

  • Chuck Marshall

    That is moronic, immature behavior!!! By the way, WE paid for the office they trashed and WE are paying to clean up their mess.

  • chris

    wow, i know it’s overdone to compare people to certain belligerant german political parties from the 30′s, but, yeah, this is kinda like that.

  • disqus_vo0fE0pu9X

    more like round up and shot as traitors to the people for their work against the country and the people.

  • Tom

    people get that this is a joke, right?

  • chris

    whoops, forgot this is satire. got me!

  • Elsie

    I had to double-check and make sure I was not reading “The Onion”

  • http://www.facebook.com/james.eliason1 James Eliason

    This is a true crime against government property. I think the perpetrators need to be prosecuted and impeached if indeed they are representatives. What does this say about their constituents who voted them into office?

  • PatheticLiberals

    You’re a bunch of lefty lunatics to eat up this horse crap as truth, however I’m not surprized, a democrat will believe anything they read, or see on TV if it’s against the republicans or the Tea party. Democrats are nothing but a bunch of Nescient Lemmings.

  • http://www.facebook.com/audrey.goddard.31 Audrey Goddard

    Hahahahahahah good point.

  • http://www.facebook.com/webghost Nick Mesterhazy

    Is this even a real artical?

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Mark-Bierman/100000764192982 Mark Bierman

    Compromise is for socialists? What could married life be like with these numnuts?

  • PatheticLiberals

    A story like this would have been plastered all over the news media, if it had a shred of validity to it. Instead it can only be seen on this useless nobody liberal blog. What a Joke!

  • Lianne

    These are the kinds of people right wingers have elected to Congress – this kind of juvenile delinquency and vandalism should be prosecuted. Party unity my foot…common decency requires that there be some consequences for this.

  • http://www.facebook.com/rachel.garber.58 Rachel Garber

    Just checked the wikipedia and confirmed that it is satirical, but has more verismilitude tham The Onion

  • Davon

    Can this be consider an act of terroism?

  • Cynic17

    Apparently, the frontal lobotomy that one gets with every Conservatard/Teabagger card excises the sense of humor as well.

    If the Doc can find a frontal lobe to begin with, that is.

  • Cynic17

    So says the true Teabagger who cannot even correctly spell “surprised”. Why are spelling and grammar such challenges for you people?

  • wolfcookie

    It doesn’t matter if Boehner decides not to press charges. It’s Federal property and those laws should be enforced. Kick the children who did this out of Congress; should they eventually grow up then they can run again.

  • brentwalker

    Spelled correctly maybe, but still desperately ignorant. And these guys are congressmen???

  • Not your babysitter

    2014! Goodbye immature spoiled rotten embarrassing nitwits that are a huge waste of our taxes dollars!

  • http://www.facebook.com/tclark1947 Terry Clark

    I wish someone had the balls to do that. Its so nice to be represented by a goofball who is no more thought of in Congress than to have his appear as the first suspect. This from a man who was a district judge in Texas. So much for respecting the law Judge Goober.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Ben-Huffman/100000681422406 Ben Huffman

    This is beyond ridiculous. I feel the need for a disclaimer that out pitas not satire. It’s not satire is it?

  • T. Burrows

    I am sad for so many of you commenting on here for one reason only: Apparently you do not know this website and this article is all satire. For those that do not know what that means let me enlighten you: Satire is the use of humor, irony, exaggeration, or ridicule to expose and criticize people’s stupidity or vices, particularly in the context of contemporary politics and other topical issues. That is from the dictionary so it is not I that is calling all of you stupid, Webster is :) Have a nice day

  • T. Burrows

    Oddly enough actual theft and and destruction of property has occurred by our public officials. The one that has happened in most of our lifetimes was hardly noted and is rarely known by the uneducated masses. The perpetrator took over 100,000 dollars worth of furniture and other property when he left office. The person responsible: BILL CLINTON! Now, yell at the Tea Party all you want for a comedic and totally false article but what Clinton did actually happened and yet nothing was ever done. Who really is the problem here?

  • http://www.facebook.com/ronald.head Ronald Head

    Any repairs should not be paid with tax money, why that’d be un-teaparty like. The fools who did the damage should pay for every penny spent to repair his office and they should be, at a minimum, centured.

  • zaidi b

    When you lie with rat-brained people, you wake up with Cheezits bits all over your face.

  • Colleen

    Why no charges? This is destruction of public property. How about acting like responsible adults instead of teenage vandals?

  • http://twitter.com/louistwermann Louis Wermann

    You dummies are posting comments on a satirical article.

  • http://twitter.com/louistwermann Louis Wermann

    You don’t have to check Wikipedia, you can read the About section in which they clearly state they are satirical and that their mission is to ridicule.

  • http://twitter.com/louistwermann Louis Wermann

    It is satire. Helps to read the “about” section in the publications you refer to.

  • http://twitter.com/louistwermann Louis Wermann

    No, it is not a real article.

  • http://www.facebook.com/lpayette1 Lois Payette

    So, our duly elected representatives have shown themselves to be nothing but juvenile mafia, willing to destroy the head man’s office, to enforce their doctrine! Mr. Boehner must have been really threatened for him not to press charges for this destruction, which, of course, the taxpayers will undoubtedly have to pay for in order to set his office back in order. This is the type of behavior that these men were sent to Washington to display to the world??? What a disgusting show of childish behavior for a group of supposedly grown men.

  • http://www.facebook.com/kittyjayneb KittyJayne BaileyHighlands

    They have spell check on equipment paid for by the taxpayers.

  • http://www.facebook.com/aj.wylam Aj Wylam

    i don’t want to pay for this damage as a taxpayer, file the charges and make them pay

  • Evidence

    Looks like another expensive bill for the taxpayers. . . . = (

  • LOCORIBO

    Wow! They really are toddlers! Actually, I apologize for insulting children.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1643186481 Kevin Koehler

    How come we haven’t heard from the “Fair and Balanced” crew about this? I am surprised that those talking A-holes haven’t told us that it will cost Taxpayers $4 million (or what-ever exaggerated amount) for this.

  • Mark McPhedran

    Not being a regular reader of The Currant, and teabaggers being as idiotic as they are, I almost believed this, but then I realized this is the only source posting this story, and remembered that The Currant is actually satire, like the Onion.

  • John Dodd

    “…but a spokesperson from Boehner’s office says he will not be filing charges in the name of “party unity”.” Is this up to Speaker Boehner? It was not his property that was destroyed, it was the People’s property. Someone needs to be brought to account.

    If Representative Gohmert is found responsible for this, may we in the 1st Congressional District of Texas finally come to terms that this is not the man to represent the people of East Texas.

  • Mark McPhedran

    You came so close to connecting the dots, but it seems like your two functioning brain cells were just not up to the task. Do some investigation, and read the site’s disclaimer before you shoot your mouth off and make an idiot of yourself. That goes for everyone else who actually examined the claims of this article at face value. Everything on this site is satire.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Gabby-Parsons/1591884120 Gabby Parsons

    You DO know the Daily Currant is a humor site similar to The Onion.

  • http://www.facebook.com/edward.j.belanger Edward J. Belanger

    It’s not HIS office, It’s OUR office. That building and ALL the rooms inside of it BELONG to the PEOPLE of the United States. That is destruction of PUBLIC property, Federal property and I believe that is a felony. Why is he covering up for Felons? Yet THEY insist upon Impeaching the president for taking laws into his own hands? What hypocrisy!

  • Mark McPhedran

    It seems the Doc performing the lobotomy forgot this sap’s Broca’s area, primary motor, premotor, and supplementary motor areas (which are all in the frontal lobe, and are involved in language production (Broca’s area specifically), and the production of motor sequences needed to type)

  • Mark McPhedran

    It’s satire. This didn’t actually happen.

  • Mark McPhedran

    It’s satire. This never happened.

  • Mark McPhedran

    This is just snark. All articles on this site are satirical.

  • Mark McPhedran

    This article is a work of satire. None of this actually happened.

  • Mark McPhedran

    Read the disclaimer in the “About” section at the bottom people. This didn’t actually happen. The Daily Currant is a satirical website, like the Onion.

  • http://www.facebook.com/carolann.booher Carol Ann Hunigan Booher

    if regular joe had broken in they would be in jail… but these teabagging politicians can do anything but i do thank it is funny ..the ones he has worked the hardest for are now deserting him lol

  • http://www.facebook.com/tim.kavis Tim Kavis

    you do know the story is a joke right morons?

  • droich

    I’ve never encountered this website before, and know nothing about it apart from reading the comments here. I find it very interesting that so many people who are apparently in the same boat assumed that this story was true. What does that say about our perception of current politicians?

  • NanaY

    Many are saying this is satire. Is it? Is it really true?

  • John Shady

    These offices are Federal offices, therefore it should not be Boehner’s choice on filing charges. When you deface government property you face prosecution. Boenhner doesn’t have the intestinal fortitude to stand up to their bullying, but that should not keep them from punishment of some kind. Our tax dollars pay for the maintenance of these buildings so can we as taxpayers press charges?

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1407076776 Jeannie Clorite

    I don’t think it is his choice if he will or not. The property is FEDERAL property. NOT his. So the criminals should be arrested and face a trial. Would he be so forgiving if the people who broke in were Dems….I THINK NOT! Taxpayer money is being used and the people responsible should be made to make restitution. They are the ones complaining about money being wasted and HERE it is beong wasted. The office that was broken into was the property of the U,S,. So find these terrorist and make them answer for the crimes they have commited on the American people.

  • gorgegirl

    Didn’t the republicans make a big deal about the “W’s” being missing when Bill Clinton left office?

  • Daskat

    Dem tee party bastards, bess not be messin wit my obama monies….

  • erehwon

    I am continually amazed, no, in fact my mind is boggled by the realization that fully HALF of the comments on these articles in The Daily Currant believe that the articles are true. In-friggin’-credible!