Obama Announces Plan to Forgive All Student Loans

Aug 22, 2013

p051913ps-0466President Obama announced a plan today to forgive 100 percent of all federal student loans in the country.

In a speech in Scranton, PA the president told an assembled crowd that it was unfair to hold college graduates to promises they made as students and outlined his vision for ending all student loan payments by the end of the year.

"Just because someone borrowed a bunch of money doesn't mean they have to pay it back," he explained to a friendly crowd at Scranton University. "This isn't 19th century England. This is America. And in America we've always believed in second chances.

"In today's economy a university education is more important than ever. Where would successful people like Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Tom Hanks, Brad Pitt or Mark Zuckerberg be without their college diplomas? These days skipping college just isn't an option, but neither is continuing to pay for increasingly expensive tuition.

"We need colleges to teach our young people useful skills like sociology, gender studies and postmodern Moldovan literary analysis. But the most important thing we need to teach them is responsibility. And what better way to teach responsibility than to hold these banks accountable for the terrible loans they've made."

 Nor a Lender Be

The student loan burden in America is estimated at over $1 trillion, with most of that in the federal government's hands. There are an estimated 40 million student loan borrowers who hold an average of $24,000 of debt between them. The cost of a college education in the U.S. has risen 600% since 1980, much faster than inflation.

Although since the financial crisis the level of other types of debt such as mortgages and credit cards has fallen, student loan debt has continued to rise alarmingly. Some economists have called this trend a crisis, as heavy loan burdens discourage consumer spending and housing sales among the young.

Many liberal activists have called for the type of loan forgiveness Obama announced today. Conservative economists, however, have called for the government to leave the market altogether, noting that cheap government loans allow students to artificially bid up the price of higher education.

Under Obama's plan all $900 billion in federal student loans will be wiped out on Nov. 1, and no further payments need be made after that date. The loss of revenue will add significantly to the U.S. government's deficit, although the cost would be spread out over several years.

The reaction among recent college graduates to the program has so far been ecstatic. Ryan Howard, a local paper salesman and graduate of Scranton University's MBA program, says he can't wait to have his debt forgiven.

"My wife, Kelly, has expensive tastes and we have another baby on the way," he explains. "I could really use the money."

  • Carl Toersbijns

    wondering if this is just for a certain term or grandfather all student loans even those in default. One has to ask if they are among the forgiven ones as they are paying on them through other means e.g. federal paychecks, and other garnisheed methods including disability and social security payments. does anyone really know how this is to be implemented and for what timeline? I am paying on mine but wondering if this is true as it sounds or if there is a catch to it…………… for nothing is free.

  • Stanhope’s Bitch

    This is a joke…right? It has to be…Obama hasn’t done squat to help the needy and the poor, let alone those hard workers that work their butts off to pay back student loans… This is the most spineless president ever… Grow some balls Obama…and get some sh*t done before you have to leave.

  • disqus_g6fqjyhj09

    I don’t think there’s a single thing on this website that’s true, lol

  • cr

    This article is untrue. Neither, Bill Gates or Steve Jobs graduated from college.

  • Henning Roschberg

    Q. Are your news stories real?

    A. No. Our stories are purely fictional. However they are meant to
    address real-world issues through satire and often refer and link to
    real events happening in the world

  • Michael Edwards

    Why even post something like this that isn’t true? You scared to post the truth of what’s really going on in this country ?

  • DR

    This is insane and he contradicts himself. I agree with “cr” that they did not graduate from college…I don’t know about you but I was always taught that responsibility comes from fulfilling one’s promises and absolutely not the other way around. The loans were provided by the federal government not banks so what in the world is he talking about?! Oh and this will be GREAT for the US debt/deficit. Good grief, Obama.

  • TheBlackMovementFoundation
  • Taz Mann

    how do we find out more about this program

  • DailyCurrant

    Neither did Mark Zuckerberg, Tom Hanks or Brad Pitt.

  • Indí

    PEOPLE ! this is a joke webpage..teaches you not to see or believe anything you read online!:)

  • DailyCurrant

    Neither did Tom Hanks, Brad Pitt or Mark Zuckerberg.

  • DailyCurrant

    Neither did Tom Hanks, Brad Pitt or Mark Zuckerberg.

  • Regizon Morgenz

    AWWWW.. as we people of this world are always being fooled in any aspects of our lives.. To them, humanity is nothing but a joke.

  • Leftwing Nutjob

    What about the affordable healthcare act, which conservatives lovingly call OBAMAcare. What about doing something to help the elderly trapped in the republican created “donut hole”.

  • http://manicfringe.herokuapp.com/ Lucien Gendrot

    Wow. All of you need to learn to recognize satire when you see it. It’s not that hard people.

  • Creed

    Ryan Howard the paper salesman with the MBA from Scranton University with a wife named Kelly, sounds like The Office to me

  • Math

    I wish, since Congress voted to make it near impossible for students to go bankrupt, BUT THEN forgot to make it so lenders (Sallie Mae) couldn’t charge ridiculous interest…

    A 70k loan at 2% interest -($644 monthly payments)- and
    A 70k loan at 12% interest -($1,0004. a month)-
    are two different things!

    So when you’re stuck debt FOR LIFE, with interest too high, and if you CANT afford to pay 900+ a month to student loans… What should you do? Go bankrupt like everyone else, you cant…

    you cant even flee the country, to change your identity, because it takes time and money to become a citizen somewhere else.

    Fake your death or illegally immigrate…

  • Mick Beers

    Hope this is fake

  • Not falling for false press

    this article is fake. the Scranton speech won’t happen until the 23rd, this article was written today. the president was in New York State all day and never announced a 100% forgiveness plan. wake up, you can’t believe everything you see on the Internet.

  • Math

    God forbid the country do something to help its citizens…

  • k191

    Sorry, not a real story. This whole website is satire, the article tried to make that clear.

  • FefeNic

    You can’t bankrupt student loans

  • Bas

    He was being facetious.

  • nickpoorman

    Could have made this so much better by citing the fact that Obama was at the poorest high school in Syracuse, NY today instead of saying Scranton University.

  • naliana

    ur kidding. theres the public service loan forgiveness program. u pay a min amount based off ur income and after 10 years of payment, the entire rest of ur loan is completely forgiven. He def has helped me! If he leaves tomorrow, i will kno my pres worked it out for me because i have more than 140k in debt from parents who couldnt afford to send me to college and i made a way out of no way. Took out loans and attended private schools instead of pub institutions . Now i only have to pay back less than half because my real payments are supposed to be twice what im paying right now based on 20 yr repayment. and i’ll be done in 8 yrs. Completely wiped of stud loan debt.

  • Incurably Imbecilic

    Step One: google the word ‘satire’.
    Step Two: feel accordingly dumb.

  • MainFragger

    I realize this is satire. But at the same time, interest rates on some school loans are as high as 50%.. That’s criminal! It would be nice if someone locked interest at 10% or lower for school loans and credit cards.

  • MCKornbred

    Oh how I wish. LMAO!

  • Bob

    I have loans, but I think this is a stupid idea from a less than stellar human being. It defeats the idea of accountability. Taking ownership is part of being human. If you just give people the easy way out then what is the point of living. No wonder America is falling apart, we have freedoms because people worked hard and sacrificed not because people borrowed a bunch of money to major in some useless field and then complain when they could not get a job.

  • dj

    ok so what did bush do for you?

  • Nononana

    Satire. Learn to recognize it.

  • sleeper

    This is definitely a joke or satire. Do we not teach responsibility? A student loan is an obligation, much like a home mortgage; education brings some level of success and therefore responsibilty. Our government cannot excuse all student debt! What message does that send to future generations?

  • _beast47

    Lmao “Just because someone borrowed a bunch of money doesn’t mean they have to pay it back,” Yea Right.

  • smee

    This website also has an article about the pope coming out as gay and Selena Gomez saying Bieber has Tiny, Weird Penis. The article is a joke. You can’t teach students responsibility by not requiring them to pay money they borrowed. Credit card and mortgage debt have not declined since the financial crisis. Many Americans have depended on credit cards to get them through the crisis and in turn are now in more credit card debt. People have taken out mortgages on their homes and lost their homes. Hellooo?! However I did find the article hilarious. I also found the fact that people believed the article alarming. A sucker is born every minute!

  • Alex

    You made a commitment to paying back those loans. You should be ashamed of yourself.

  • b

    may be satire, but still a pathetic attempt

  • Guest

    ummm I dont remember Bill Gates graduating from college and didnt Zuckerberg drop out?. Anyways did President Obama really just say”…Just because someone borrowed a bunch of money doesn’t mean they have to pay it back,”????…..man I would LOVE to live in the fantasy world he is in…but hey if it forgives my studenT loan before they start taking it out of my tax returns I’M ALL IN!!! Also one more thing Mr. Ryan Howard it sounds like you and your wifes expensive taste needs to be a little bit less expensive especially with another baby on the way.

  • Red Sese

    I really hope you know this isn’t real. And he’s not helping you or anyone else in fact if this had been real to begin with. Those loans that would have been “wiped away” would’ve surfaced as another tax increase. Students don’t think about the repercussions on a national scale, and are only focused on the welfare of themselves. Stop being selfish, honor your agreement, and stop giving yourself a pity party.

  • Constance Backuppage DaPrinces

    I knew something was off when I stumbled upon…”Just because someone borrowed a bunch of money doesn’t mean they have to pay it back,” lol!

  • fanci

    does this include current students? if so..sweet. :D

  • Amy J. Train

    Uh, yes this is satire, but the comments are hilarious. Especially the people who think this is a GOOD idea. I’m amazed at the stupidity of people who actually believe that someone wouldn’t have to pay the money back. Taxpayers would. And not just the rich. In case you’ve been living under a rock, everyone got their taxes raised, except those people who don’t pay taxes at all. The payroll tax went up this year, Obamacare (which is a tax, according to the supreme court), and a recent new $5 per month tax on your cell phone bill (which never went through Congress and those evil Republicans. The President did that on his own). There is NEVER something for nothing. Someone pays for it. While people accuse the rich of being greedy for wanting to keep their own money, isn’t a little bit greedy to want someone else’s money?

  • Ron

    We know this is fake, largely because all the successful people named who wouldn’t be where they are without “college diplomas” don’t have college degrees. They are all college dropouts.

  • Nikki

    I graduated last year. I have a good amount of student loans. I am also planing on paying them back so that I am not a burden on my country and I have a plan to do so within the next year. If he wants to teach responsibility teach that you should go into trade school for things such as social work. The other two he mentioned were only ever supposed to be pass times. They were never intended to make any money. If you can not afford to pay back your loans for your pass times the responsible thing to do would be not to take the loans out in the first place.

  • Juno

    Brad Pitt and Zuckerberg didn’t either. Zuckerberg dropped out 2nd year.

  • nomorebsplz

    The funny thing is I read this knowing it’s satire, knowing I am on a blog dedicated to it. Then I read the ‘headlines’ below and think “WOW, Amanda Bynes is a mess, commenting on the Royal Baby being ugly oh god I feel for it again”. Damn you, Daily Currant.

  • Mai7

    No matter what this man do or say you bastards can’t give him credit. You know, where I work a Cuban is our boss. When his wife was in an accident my co-worker says I hope she dies. This is a really nice man. I asked her why she would say that he’s the only one that would give you a raise. People really should have a monitor on their Brains that would check sentences before they rolled off their tongues.

  • Andrew C Livingston

    It’s called satire.

  • mai7

    always a coup in the group.

  • Andrew C Livingston

    He alludes to this in his comment, first sentence.

  • Andrew C Livingston

    Actually, in no definition I’ve ever read of “human being” is “taking ownership” ever mentioned.

  • Mai7

    Some people don’t know when they’re looking a gifted horse in the mouth. Such are the infallible humans. No one talked about Bush, the drunkard or Clinton, the I didn’t have intercourse with that woman, as bad as they talk about Obama.

  • Andrew C Livingston

    This is a fake article. And they’re called “pastimes”.

  • Carena T.

    This was VERY poor satire. Satire is used to see the ironic humor in a bad situation, normally to speak out against the injustices of society (see: anything written by Mark Twain). Some conservatives prove their incapacity for empathy by thinking that loan forgiveness is ‘funny, because it’s so absurd and detrimental to our society.’ ha. ha. ha. You know what’s detrimental to our society? Charging 3.4, 6.8, 7.9, and even 8.5% on student loans, even though old people effed up the economy and blew up all of those jobs that we were supposed to get to allow us to pay those loans back. Just remember- we’ll be taking care of the lot of you in ~20 years. Karma is a B.

  • Carena T.

    which is hilarious, because what was TARP, for homeowners, pray tell? I know what you’re going to say: ‘Oh no- that’s different.’ You know what? no it’s not.

  • Meshala Akeley

    Not to mention the are using “Ryan Howard a paper salesman” LOL. Watch The Office much?!?! I love the office and about died when I read that!

  • Crystyle

    Yes!! Finally someone to acknowledge the fact that it’s not about accountability, but about availability. If you’re stuck in jobs making less than $40,000 a year because those above you with no education, but experience, won’t retire, what are you supposed to do? I was always taught that if I worked hard in school, got a good education, received a college degree, then I would experience financial growth and security. Not happening!! I have a M.A and my boss doesn’t even have an Associates, yet my boss isn’t giving up their job and I’m stuck. Trust me, I’ve tried to get in everywhere and with a 4.0 GPA from grad school, still nothing.

    Although the article is full of satire, I don’t think that it’s completely a bad idea. We bailed out banks and the automobile industry. People borrowed money on mortgages and aren’t able to pay for them and got assistance. Most graduates would love to invest in new homes and new cars but student loans are holding them back. Why not offer forgiveness, it will put more money back into the economy. If you have to choose between having food and gas for your car versus paying your student loans back, which is going to take a back seat? The government isn’t collecting 50% of the money that it has “loaned” out anyway.

  • Dan

    I guess no one really got “The Office” reference at the end.
    Ryan Howard, local paper salesman (Dunder Mifflin), his wife Kelly (kapoor). This entire article was completely based upon satire.

  • Geoffrey Waumans

    College graduate. Uses: ur, u, min (instead of minimum), def (instead of definitely), kno (Really? You couldn’t type the “w”?), pres (instead of President). Doesn’t capitalize or use apostrophes in contractions. Glad to see that edjumacashun going to good use.

  • BlackAryanHustler

    What about all the people who lost their homes in 2008, fuck off back to your cave.

  • Carl0s_Danger

    The government already has a program that excuses student debt. Just pay on time for 10 years and the rest is paid for. But you can’t miss any payments at all for 10 years.

  • Carl0s_Danger

    What a dumbass you are. WOW. lol

  • Carl0s_Danger

    And the location.. Scranton PA.

  • Fee

    Isn’t Satire supposed to be FUNNY? This was just CRUEL lol

  • A LaMika Wilson

    I know I can’t afford 20-30 thousand a year for higher education. When I’m done with my program my debt to income ratio will be so off every dime I make will be going to the interest. It will be a great stress reliever.

  • kmb

    This is silly. Where is the government going to get
    the money to wipe away all of this student loan debt? Not to mention,
    will I get reimbursed for paying off my student loans before they were
    due? I graduated December 2010, saved money, worked hard, and paid of my
    debts. Granted, my parents allowed me to live with them during the time
    (rent free but with me paying for most of the things I needed) so I could put
    the majority of my paycheck towards my student loans. I realize not
    everyone my age is blessed with parents like mine or wants to live with their
    parents, not eat fancy meals or take vacations or make a lot of unnecessary
    purchases. Bottom line, the money has to be paid back by someone.
    If not the students who got the education then I’m guess by everyone
    else. What happened to people being responsible for their actions and the
    decisions they made. What does this really teach people my age?

  • De’ Andre

    Are you freaking kidding. This money is coming from the government, which comes from tax payers money, which majority of the students are. It about time the government do something for their people to ensure a successful future.

  • robyn

    wow you are pretty hostile, you words are deep hate or hurt and since I am sure you never met him to hurt you, its hate, so I say stop hating

  • Da Som Kim

    this makes me sad……….
    it’s my first time hearing this website….

  • http://dimp-zone.net/ Dimp


  • Mark

    Gotta love ignorant uninformed people

  • De’ Andre

    I’m sorry you feel that way. I guess you aren’t one of the many people in the United States that needs the help. GOOD FOR YOU! But I can say he helped me out a lot throughout his presidency. And the way I see it is that he is trying to strengthen out economy this way for that the money that we don’t have to spend on paying back loans will be money that will be spent into the economy and many businesses.

  • Andrew

    I love the “Office” reference with Ryan Howard and Kelly. Nice toch

  • CJ Louis

    Ridiculous and mean.

  • Marco

    I do not care if the current President is Rebublican, Democrat, or whatever…If the Government wants to clean off my Student Loan Debt please go right ahead.

  • the_glove

    Are you serious?…… you’re a joke plain and simple. Shut that up and go somewhere with your life.

  • RandomPerson

    That’s irrelevant to the point. What did Clinton, Bush 1, Reagan, Carter, etc. do for you? I’m sure you could name some things, but it becomes tedious to start off every policy debate you have with that list of things. Last time I checked the President isn’t the sole policy maker in the US and shouldn’t be looked upon as a legislative idol.

  • mftreway

    you’re an imbecile.

  • Rufus McBoofus

    Yeah. Nothing funnier than crushing student debt. Hilarity fail.

  • Wow…


  • H. Clinton

    He is lying to your faces again people! Obama doesn’t just rip off a fifty thousand dollar bill from a tree does he?

  • Jessica

    I doubt this will ever happen. But maybe they could allow longer deferments, lower interest rates/payments, or even offer a payment match (for every dollar you pay back, they’ll match a dollar)

  • RB21

    These comments make me want to not live on this planet anymore..

  • Frustrated

    This is terrible! I have a bunch of college debt myself but I would rather be held responsible for my choices than get off the hook. Are we that lazy? I would love to have my debt paid off but do you realize the long-term consequences for our country to increase our debt like that?! Ugh! This makes me very concerned. Obviously something needs to change with the rising costs of university tuition. Schools should develop alternatives for students. Check out the schools where you have to work on-campus in order to pay for your tuition such as College of the Ozarks. The students work and make money for their university and thus, pay for their tuition while building necessary skills. This is a much a better system if you ask me.

  • 3D

    “Just because someone borrowed a bunch of money doesn’t mean they have to pay it back,” …. i could definitely see him saying that…

  • Hazel Cook

    excuse my I am disabled and use 1/3 of my check to pay back student loans for an education that was suppose to help me find gainful employment to get off disability so far the education has done nothing but cause me deeper debt. my age and type of disability and debt keeps me from getting a decent job to pay off my student loans so if the loans get for given then my credit goes up and a job is possible so I am all for it if its true

  • Tony Pratt

    I want to throw up when ignorance fall out of peole mouth like yours. If it was not for Democrats falling asleep at the wheel in the 2010 elections and let the WACOS take back Congress. Obama would have unemployment near 6 percent and America in a extremely better place. Since that dire mistake we have been stuck with a ridiculous congress and a ignorant republican base. Which I am sure you belong.

  • Tony Pratt

    The fact that anyone could believe this article other than the republican extreme right tickles the heck out of me.

  • Shane Mahony

    Just because the last guy didn’t do his job doesn’t give the current job holder a free pass. I really hate this “us or them” policy people have on politics.

  • Pm

    This guy is a moron! Nothing more to say!

  • kimberly smith

    I don’t believe this is true.

  • Guest

    No because Obamacare doesn’t help any of those people.

  • Kmk111691

    Why does the end of this article sound like The Office?

  • Tristan

    Yes, because obamacare doesn’t help any of those people.

  • Tristan

    Ashamed of yourself? No, the government should be ashamed. America has one of the highest rates for public education, let alone private education. It is ridiculous!

  • Dexster Adair

    I think it is a genius way to put the IDEA for all federal student loan forgivenss out there for students who have federal loans to demand for ourselves. I believe if we look at this in the context of what it could be as oppose to what it’s not, we may develop the will to demand this. The banks ran away from their debts in 2008, students are still hurting.. They use to have debt jubilee’s in Rome.. Keep spreading the article..

  • jessie

    Here’s what Obama is doing with student loans, could this story be true? http://pulsefeedz.com/rumor-control-president-obama-announces-plan-to-forgive-all-student-loans/

  • screwoff

    isn’t satire supposed to be funny?

  • Omar

    I feel like this is a troll article…

  • Omar

    Bush, Obama, next hundred presidents, all the same.

  • John

    The untrue part of the article is more than that, he’s speaking at Lackawanna College, not ‘Scranton University’ (correctly University of Scranton), and isn’t even arriving until 5 p.m. today. Perhaps The Daily Currant should wait until he actually speaks to misquote him an incorrectly name his location.

  • kyanna

    what about those who didnt finish due to financial reasons and now are in debt from it?

  • joe

    You guys aren’t very smart are you? This whole article is a joke.

  • Nulanula

    maybe his major wasnt English -.- I dont think Bill Gates or Steve Jobs also excelled in English…

  • Jason Casarez

    I think the comments here lend more credit to why the Daily Currant even exists. So many people just cannot recognize satire.

    And even when they do, they turn it into a political fight. ON A SATIRE WEBSITE! You realize that you guys are the butt of the joke every time right?

    Silly humans. You have so much to learn still….

  • Kaitlynd

    Wow! If that was true, then it wouldn’t be fair to people like me who try not to do the expensive things, like living in the dorms or going to study abroad. I could be, but I prefer not to be in debt. And what happens to people like me? I’d like a free ride, too, but that’s just not being responsible :/

  • breanna

    let me just say this. when bush was president, i had more money in my pocket and i was able to buy a house and meet all of my needs. Under obama, i have alot less money in my pocket to pay for the house and i cant meet my other needs. looking for a part time second job. sad.

  • breanna

    wish i had been given a guarantee of employment when i agreed to borrowing money for school.

  • Eric

    hey, whoever wrote this article, GO FUCK YOURSELF. Seriously, GO FUCK YOURSELF

  • Tommy Davis

    Can’t wait

  • breanna

    republicans didnt create anything when it comes to obamacare. remember that they were locked out of the process of writing it and not one of them voted for it. obamacare is ALL democrat, 100%.

  • Heather

    Yeah, this only works when you work for Federal Government or for a Public Service organization (non-profit 501(c)) for 10 consecutive years while making your payments – hope you fall into either one of those categories or else you’re in for a rude awakening

  • Guest

    Is this even remotely true?

  • Chris

    Have you ever thought about your own business. Doing something on the side to make some extra on top of what your doing?

  • ChainSmokerJoe

    “In today’s economy a university education is more important than ever. Where would successful people like Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Tom Hanks, Brad Pitt or Mark Zuckerberg be without their college diplomas?” none of them graduated from school….
    Also, this is hilarious, I borrow money, i have no problem paying it back when i finish school… Why? Because I CHOSE TO GO TO SCHOOL. I am working on a degree, in a field which i already work. Thus, the degree is to increase my job security, and get promotions. I am grateful for Student Loans, thus I will PAY THEM BACK, because I am a hard-working proud American Man. I keep my promises. Unlike this President.

  • Mr. Obvious

    It’s a satirical article. Like a joke. Get it?

  • delores_in_wa_state

    Again – twisted lies. Here is the TRUTH

    The Obama Administration recently announced changes that will allow many borrowers to take advantage of a new repayment plan that could lower their monthly federal student loan bills. from http://www.ed.gov/blog/2013/01/new-student-loan-repayment-option-to-help-recent-graduates/

  • Andybud

    Uh oh, someone doesn’t like the realization they are gullible.

  • Andybud

    Yes. Yes, you are.

  • Alex

    Bush is the reason why you have less money now. ;)

  • marie

    it’s really terrifying that people have to ask if this is real.
    does this sound plausible to you??? if it does, you are the problem with America.

  • Jill H

    i was always raised to keep a promise as well but i was also raised to believe that if i worked hard in school and went off to college i would have a successful life… not so much. college degree or not, americans are struggling and heaven forbid we get a break. people born on medicaid, receiving section 8 and foodstamps their whole lives get free rides to college… so why can’t i?! because my mother was a successful professional? i have to pay back my student loans and struggle to get by? welcome to mer’cuh.

  • Devid Voluntaryist

    I’ve been wishing I could get off this damn rock for many many years now lol

  • Joe Walsh

    they toss in a few facts to every article, kind of like the bits about student loan burden and whatnot in this one.
    Satire need some truth to be Good.

  • iordan

    yeah yeah post hoc ergo propter hoc

  • http://www.hernandocadett.com/ Hernando Cadet

    This is not true this website is pure fiction and they say it in their about page

  • http://www.hernandocadett.com/ Hernando Cadet

    if you want true entertainment go to http://www.hernandocadett.com

  • adambreel

    Alex is just happy because the rimjob industry is BOOMING.

  • adambreel

    watermelon, fried chicken, welfare

  • adambreel


  • adambreel

    You’re an entitled idiot crybaby, do you think maybe that’s the problem?
    “MA” there’s your first problem.

  • Saratoga Boy

    Bullshit ! Typical Obama bullshit, “hey lets reward the dead beats who can’t/won’t pay their bills” and punish those who payed of their student loan debt. I owed $80,000 in student loan debt that I proudly paid off. Why the F*** , how do I get my money back ? Bullshit. I could’ve bought a house.

  • bert

    The hilarious part of this article is The Office reference. Ryan Howard, paper salesman. haha

  • Sean

    They were not locked out. In the beginning Obama wanted a government option. The republicans said that would not fly, They kept negotiating to try to bring them on board, but they had ONE mission in their caucus “make Obama one term”. They refused to offer any substance, so the Dems did what they had to do

  • mel

    It’s internet lingo and 99% of people who are technologically savvy use it, even me and I just graduated with my MA in English. We all live in the 21st century and some things are just easier to abbreviate, especially when giving an opinion on a bs website/blog like this one. Stop trying to find a reason to down what she just said bc in actuality she’s completely right. What the president is trying to do (if this is true) is an awesome plan. Especially since the cost of everything is rising, including the interest on student loans…get a life and stop trying to pick on people -_-

  • E-Money

    I got that it was satire with the first few sentences yet I have seen this posted on Facebook all day! Geez are the college graduates the ones misunderstanding this. Looks like they wasted their money lmbo!

  • Cletus P. Sandpiper

    Even for Obama, I knew this had to be a joke.

  • Bob in Boston

    Yeah, grammar Nazi’s are annoying. With the prevalence of tablets and phones with no keyboards being used to surf the internet, it’s pretty dumb to think people aren’t going to abbreviations and socially acceptable internet forms of words. It’s def easier.
    The purpose of written communication is to get a point across, so if you knew what the person was saying, then the communication was effective. I’m going to go out and end a sentence with a preposition just for Geoffrey, because a preposition is a terrible thing to end a sentence with!

  • Guest

    Buying votes. Plain and simple.

  • Crystyle

    Thanks for the enlightenment.

  • SoSerious

    To all those who take this article seriously and claim to have advanced education, reading and comprehension must have not be part of your curriculum

  • LOLOL_no

    I work in the tech industry, 99% of internet users do not use ‘internet lingo.’

  • Frida

    Well I guess you are just superior in every way.

  • The_Aliens

    This isn’t satire anymore. Maybe what the Daily Currant used to do was in the same vein as the Onion, but it’s definitely not anymore.

    This is wide-reaching, mean-spirited hoaxing designed so people with poor media literacy skills can have their dreams of a life without debt lifted and then painfully crushed (but not by the Currant itself, obviously.)

    The Daily Currant is making the world a worse place for its own amusement and the amusement of a bunch of pasty internet-addicted lonely white guys.

  • Anubii

    :( Satirical articles like these make me so sad.

  • jrebel

    Yeah its pretty funny when a group of chimps accidentally spell out words on a keyboard, and im not even being sarcastic.

  • John

    Grammar Nazis*

  • Rob

    I have more money in my pocket and able to exceed my needs under Obama than Bush. So what does that mean? You’re just sucking at life Breanna.

  • theshamburglar


  • theshamburglar

    I dunno, this article seems legit.

  • airreal

    tech….short for technical. Just Sayin

  • theshamburglar

    Reading is hard.

  • Lyle E Long

    . The US has $70 trillion in unfunded liabilities and this just adds to it. Pay it all back

  • mel

    ^case in point…

  • Tisha Mishelle Colbert

    Other countries have further education free why not th greatest country.. USA

  • Kitty

    Freaking unfair to those of us that took responsibility and paid off our loans like adults. Do we get a refund?

  • jeccaG

    You don’t actually know what an MA is, do you.
    They can get you a fantastic job (especially if you’re a Comp Sci major)… when those jobs are there to be had, of course. Crystyle’s point stands, and you’re a simpleton.

  • jeccaG

    In other news, fire’s hot and water’s wet.

  • Natalie Steutterman

    Soooo naive Alex…sad………..

  • jeccaG

    This is a satirical article on a fake news site. Reading comprehension must not’ve been part of your degree program.

  • Natalie Steutterman

    You must work for him then !! B O is a failure………….ALL around !! Face facts!

  • jeccaG

    I don’t think you can call it “twisted lies” when it’s a satirical article on a fake news website.

  • jeccaG

    This is a satirical article on a fake news website. For fuck’s sake.

  • jeccaG

    Hopefully it’ll teach you to recognize a satirical article on a fake news website when you see one.

  • joek

    My God, no wonder this country is doomed… Sure, lets just add another trillion dollars to the national debt. Why is your generation any more entitled then the previous or the next?

  • http://www.top10kitchen.com/ Daniel Foster

    If it were as simple as “putting money back into the economy” the Federal Reserve would have done that a long time ago.

    The usefulness of a master’s degree depends heavily on the area and institution. An associate degree in computer science, a difficult field with a high demand for workers, could very well earn more than someone with a PhD in the liberal arts.

    Work experience also counts for quite a bit. A master’s degree by itself often isn’t of much value in the workplace.

  • uptomealso

    looking to start our own business

  • Bush fan

    You’re exactly the problem with this country. You got loans that you won’t pay back. Yeah you come out clean. Where did that money come from? Take your handout you non-contributing drain on society. Same as welfare or free health care. Socialist idiots never learn.

  • Matty

    “The Daily Currant is an English language online satirical newspaper that covers global politics, business, technology, entertainment, science, health and media. It is accessible from over 190 countries worldwide – now including South Sudan.

    Our mission is to ridicule the timid ignorance which obstructs our progress, and promote intelligence – which presses forward.”

    -The Daily Currant

  • http://www.ampmseo.com/ Ed Luvables

    It’s pretty easy to check a sidebar and see what else a blog is publishing before forming an opinion. It’s not rocket science.

  • Random

    hahaha what do you mean what Clinton do your research his plans was awesome gas averaged 90 cent when he was president because he let reserves go so please random person do research but your point well taken

  • Charlise

    Is it only applying to graduates , what about students still in school but have taken out loans already?

  • Frida

    You are just too cool for words.

  • Rick L

    Explain that one Alex !! Were all ears !!!

  • rubisco

    Never read the Daily Currant before, eh?

  • fdsfkdsfidsifidsii

    grow up

  • Tom Sargeant

    I just watched his speech in Scranton, PA. He did not say this directly. How did the Daily Currant arrive at this conclusion. http://www.c-span.org/Events/Pres-Obama-Discusses-College-Costs-in-New-York-Pennsylvania/10737440982/

  • fdsfkdsfidsifidsii

    You must have watched the wrong speech. That is exactly what he said, word-for-word. This article is 100% accurate and is not made up at all.

  • fdsfkdsfidsifidsii

    you can see if you are eligible at http://www.irs.gov/iamanidiot/student_loan_forgiveness

  • fdsfkdsfidsifidsii

    File for bankruptcy. While you’re at it, get a lobotomy.

  • SteveBagenstose

    is a side bar the kind next to the bigger bars?

  • tom

    I could have a field day editing your comment for grammatical errors!

    Ending a sentence with a preposition is not grammatically incorrect, it is an archaic faux pas.


  • Jamie Rozek

    Shut up, stupid.

  • Jamie Rozek

    Right….Clinton dropped gas prices. Just like Obama and Bush raised them, right?

    Actually, genius—-a lot of what we are going through now is due to the policies of the Reagan/Bush/Clinton administrations.

    Learn your politics/economics.

  • Jamie Rozek

    People tend to have more money when they are getting more entitlements.

  • Jamie Rozek

    Sorry, how did obama do this again? This isn’t an obama program. Nice try.

  • Dan

    ryan howard a local paper salesman? Scranton? NBC’s The OFFICE

  • Jamie Rozek

    ABSOLUTELY! Proper use of the English language is completely dumb!

  • Jamie Rozek

    Obama care is stupid and will destroy this country. There were better options available. However, because this was more about “who has the better party” instead of “What is the best plan for America” ….we got a stupid plan, just so the democraps could take ownership of creating healthcare. Pathetic.

  • Jamie Rozek

    The fact that you are stupid enough to believe this nonsense tells me our country is in trouble.

  • nevada_geon

    “Learn your politics/economics.”
    Only don’t learn them from you, right douche rocket?
    Pretty obvious you must have taught Obanana everything he knows.

  • Rob Grace

    Half of that 900 billion is mine… :( This is like joking about water in the Sahara…

  • RememberSekhmet

    U mad, bro?

  • Nigeria Riggins

    I’m not laughing. This is a horrible joke.

  • Tom Sargeant

    Can someone provide a link to a video of the speech where he said this? I want to listen to it for myself. Please help.

  • Guest

    There has to be a catch, like quadrupling the tax rate for every American. Even if my student loans are forgiven, how is that going to matter when I might be forced to pay larger taxes to forgive the loan taken out by an unemployed person that decided to take a loan to obtain his/her doctorate in gender studies ? There has to be a catch.

  • sammyjames

    Just because a degree doesn’t earn 6 figures, it doesn’t automatically mean the subject of study is useless.

  • sammyjames

    Not to mention, if people studied the arts more (with those “silly” BAs and MAs…), more readers would realize this is SATIRE.

  • Lucien is a dipshit

    Satire is supposed to be funny and this isn’t.

  • notawelcher

    so in other words, you gamed the system…congrats on that I suppose. of course SOMEONE is paying the difference…oh, that’s right, it’s me (and your neighbor probably, and their cousins, and friends) because when your loan is “forgiven” it’s money that has already been spent, and has to come from somewhere…yay national debt, yay higher taxes, yay inflation!

  • Reme

    Thank you Obama!

  • peoplerlazy

    People just need to suck it up and work hard for money to pay back what they signed up to borrow. Ya, interest rates are sky high, jobs are hard to come by, blah, blah, blah. I graduated with 60,000 of debt and have still managed to pay my loans, buy a nice home, and still maintain my active lifestyle three years after college. If you work hard, you can get it done. People just need to focus up and stop relying on others to get them by. Be smart, like not buying a brand new car that is worth half of what you paid for it when you drive it off the lot. A new car should never be considered an investment.

  • Reme

    Its Bush’s fault!

  • Reme

    What’s the difference between Bush and Obama?

  • Reme

    Love you Obama!!

  • GretaN

    Thank HEAVENS this is satire. Let is REMAIN THAT WAY.

  • serenalovestrees

    this is a really stupid website. I wish it would go away. Satire is LAME.

  • GretaN
  • GretaN
  • benjo

    It’s a joke… not real… satire

  • Vay

    Bill gates dropped out of college. Everybody knows that

  • brathor1

    Oh man, you guys are pretty darn clever.

  • Chelsea Manzullo Melrose

    Interesting. Since Jobs, Gates and Zuckerberg were all college drop-outs.

  • sledge2k

    And so Captain Obvious was promoted to Admiral.

  • tracker

    We took out loans. We received counseling telling us we had to pay them back. What part of “you have to pay it back” didn’t you understand? I knew that I was going to be paying out the nose for a long time. I got myself into the mess I’m in and by golly I’m working on getting myself out of it. Buckle down people and grow up. The world owes you NOTHING. The money we borrowed belongs to someone. It didn’t magically appear in your bursar account. Someone gave it to you to use for school, and they want it back with interest. That’s the definition of a “loan”.

    If you don’t know where to start, to dig yourself out of the mess YOU made (YOU, yes YOU, not the government or anyone else, YOU), I suggest you google Dave Ramsey and follow his advice to the letter. Excuses won’t get you anywhere. Keep in mind, that there are no shortcuts to anywhere worth going.

  • david

    Only a complete asshole would write this.

  • tracker

    Apparently, they thought that ‘postmodern Moldovan literary analysis’ was an important skill so they took the article seriously. LOL

  • Siryx Voidwalker

    I’m wondering if this applies to the students still in college? Or does it only mean the students that graduate?

  • cardiodude

    OMG, is that all this guy has is giving away the money of generations yet unborn to gain favor with those around today. How sick a society have we become?

  • Gary


  • Mamacat

    Satire would be fine….but this is too close to cruelty. People commit suicide over their loans.

  • ANW

    “We need to teach them responsibility but, just because they borrowed a bunch of money doesn’t mean they have to pay it back”…….. REALLY!!! OMG!! Everyday I think this couldn’t possibly get ANY worse!

  • yo

    I think it’s kinda awesome that you take so much time for researching details, you failed to research the source of the details..but still decent info.

  • zhaotron88

    Mr. howard needs to slap his wife in the face and take her on a trip to a 3rd world country. She doesn’t know struggle.

  • Evy Rosebrook

    Correct me if I am wrong, but I don’t think B. Gates has a College degree. Have to go google that.

  • Evy Rosebrook

    College diploma from Harvard 30 years after he dropped out of college originally.

  • James

    The people on this comment board are FEROCIOUS. So having a phd in English probably wont get you a job, where as a bachelors in computer tech probably will. Don’t forget not too long ago (meaning about 10 years ago or so) people were going to school to become teachers by the boat fulls and most of them were actually getting jobs. Now going to school to be a k-12 teacher isn’t any better than getting a phd in ancient Chinese pottery. Times change and with this change comes different demands. So whats in demand now probably wont be in another 10-20 years. However I do have to agree with most that the medical and tech fields are really hot and have historically been. But what is everyone going to college suppose to enter these fields against their interest to get a job? Market saturation much? When you start to break it down it isn’t as black and white as most of you make it to be.

  • James

    Everyone is human… we have had 44 presidencies since 1789 do you think all of them were AMAZING…. its been hundreds of years and only a hand full of these presidents truly changed the country in a positive way, but even those presidents made mistakes…. stop being so ignorant… if you hate how it is change it.

  • Lynn

    As awesome as this sounds, and how happy I would be, as a recent college graduate myself, it probably won’t happen.

  • Renee

    This article literally makes me laugh out loud, between the lack of research about the names he used and the dumb idea that the loans could just disappear and improve life is a joke! This will not teach responsibility, sure i would like to get rid of my loans but someone has to pay for them (in all rights i took them out so i should pay for them) and for real none of the people he listed have a college diploma, they all dropped out!

  • Mike

    Allow me to inform you all that this is a satire website -.- In other words, this article is intended to be a joke.

  • dh

    will he possibly forgive my punch to his face?

  • guywhiteycorngood

    Satire is supposed to be satirical, not just fake news you wish was true because haha wouldn’t that be kinda sorta funny. There’s no actual joke here. Read this then find any random article on the homepage of The Onion right now. There’s fake news satire done right and then there’s this.

  • Googly eyes

    Bill Gates is a college drop it, so was Jobs… Nice try though.

  • disqus_XeFVQf2YXo

    Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Tom Hanks, Brad Pitt, none of these guys graduated fro college.. all of them dropped out to go into their known line of business..

  • AWCheney

    How can anyone assume ANYTHING when it comes to this man? I’m afraid that you just can’t depend on his NOT wanting to destroy the youth of this country and teach them to become just as unaccountable for their actions as he is!

  • Ladi Diamond

    Apparently, you are not married or have children. People have unexpected issues that happen and that is what we call life. So you were blessed to be able to sustain and have a decent life but many do not have such luxuries. No one plans to fail but we often fail to plan. Colleges/Universities are overrated because I know many people that have gone to college got their b.a. and m.a. that could not find work straight out of college so sometimes there are obstacles that stop some from reaching their goals. So don’t be so quick to judge or assume because you can only walk in your shoes. #Food4Thought

  • jo

    This is clearly satire but to all those who roasted those college graduates who took the article as true dont you think this speaks to the dire situation that those individuals are in. Personally my instate diploma cost me 28000 dollars to complete and the only job I could find out of college paid 39000. Now you could jump on me and say that I shouldve went to a better school than FSU but my older sister went to Penn (IVY) and it took her almost 5 yrs after college to find a salary that paid enough money for her to pay her loans back and live like a person who went to college.

  • Guest

    YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!! #Free #education???!! I got #robbed a little (understatement) from A.I. (#ArtInstitute) of corruption with other #schools that got #sued by the #government. The #dude is still a #douche but he gets some #stickers for this. #xD #Zen.

  • Seth A. Yellin

    YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!! Free education???!! I got robbed a little (understatement) from A.I. (Art Institute) of corruption with other schools that got sued by the government. The dude is still a douche but he gets some stickers for this. xD Zen.

  • ∆٩

    old people? try social entitlements and out of control big government – policies voted in by an electorate of young uninformed…. go get a clue

  • Tami Joy Phillips

    Ok i have a question is that law for only that college or is that ALL colleges in All 50 states .

  • Buddy

    I totally agree with this.. I feel like I could’ve gotten further if I went straight into the work force rather than straight to college… the people before me who have no degree to their names are holding jobs… and it seems as if jobs are looking for experience rather than education. I wish I was more educated about my options and the different types of loans rather than jumping straight into things… this is great news for some, but my private loan are still there!!!

  • Lisa Gabriella Flores

    I do apologize for asking you this bt would know if this is only for graduates or also for students adding to their loans. I have a few years left but have already managed to get up to about $40,00 plus some change.
    I am a Ft Mommy of 4 of the 5, and very ill but plan on becoming well enough to return to work again one day so figured I would get a few degree’s while in treatment. I still have a few big classes left in my BA in Special Education buy trying to hurry. I should be completed by the time my 2 year old is ready for school.
    Sorry for the long response but you seem knowledgeable about this post.

    Take Care and Thank You,

  • shmoe

    cut taxes so you had more $$$$

  • Annalisse Mayer

    Bill Gates has no college diploma. He dropped out after his freshman year. Don’t know about the others.

  • wtf

    Yeah, this isn’t really funny. Let’s not post articles like this anymore. Thanks!

  • Lil25

    So… how come all the engineers I know can’t afford their student loans….?

  • http://manicfringe.herokuapp.com/ Lucien Gendrot

    Oh, my mistake. I mistook that for a subjective opinion.

    You’re right in your infinite wisdom, oh internet troll.

  • http://manicfringe.herokuapp.com/ Lucien Gendrot

    Well, I mean, obviously.

  • nicole

    university of scranton**** scranton university does not exist.

  • James Russel

    Based on this comment, I’m assuming you weren’t an economics major.

  • James Russel

    Very little. Just like his predecessor and now his successor. They’re all worthless. Your point is?

  • James Russel

    I love how it’s hilarious when Republicans are satirized, but the Democrats just aren’t mature enough to handle it.

  • Desza

    I wish this article were true! *sigh*

  • bla

    Maybe you’re just friends with the wrong people. Most of the people I know are fine.

  • Msv

    http://www.time.com/time/specials/packages/completelist/0,29569,1988080,00.html the only one not on the list is brad pitt. great speech mr president

  • kimmyincali

    Awwww..is this the next group of voters Ovomit is trying to buy off?? If they cannot see they are putting the last nail in the coffin of their own futures by listening and believing the garbage that spews out of his mouth….enjoy the 3rd world country your building for yourselves. How you expect to build a future when you want someone else to foot the bill for your insurance until your 26, and pick up the tab for your college education, pay for your partying a reproductive needs or accidents…whatever the case may be, good luck to you!…cause your gonna need it!!! You’d think with this high dollar education all of you are getting you’d be able to add 1+1=2 Well….when there is more going out than coming in, that spells disaster. I guess maybe we need to start teaching these Einsteins how to balance a checkbook in grade school because they think money printed by the Government is FREE.
    Isn’t it amazing…I got my first job before I was even able to drive and all of my kids did the same…had no one give any of us FREE money for insurance OR college educations and with NO thanks to Ovomit, are still making it with hard work, in this CRAPPY economy. But oh yeah…I forgot…we have a country full of people who don’t know what it means to work for the things they want and need anymore and think they are OWED to them just because they can get them somewhere for free. INSANITY or in simpler terms….LIBERALISM.

  • kimmyincali

    Probably because he’s gettin all that free student debt ;) Has more time to look up Satire and use it in a sentence.

  • kimmyincali

    Maybe because they believe all the crap coming out of Ovomits mouth and are having buyers remorse for voting for him AGAIN….kinda hard to pay those student loans when you don’t have a job that collects a paycheck ;) well…other than working some minimum wage job…that is if you can wrestle it away from an illegal alien ;)

  • beep55

    Way to go! Now let’s talk about ways to reduce tuition for students. Oregon has a plan to do just that. Perhaps that is a model we should follow.

  • John Michael Runyon

    While this article is clearly a joke, I feel moved to respond to the comments. To all the people who think that this would be a good idea: you are crazy. Why do you deserve something like this? If your business was selling things on credit and suddenly the government decided to forgive all of your customers debt, what would happen to you? Your bosses not wanting to give up their job or whatever crappy reason you find to feel sorry for yourself is not impressive. If you don’t want debt, don’t borrow money. Not making enough money to pay off your debt is not an excuse or a justifiable reason for this. Find a better job. Maybe learn some budgeting skills, but please don’t forget that it was your choices that put you where you are today. It is not everyone else’s responsibility to pay for them.

  • PhoenixWisdom

    Man if one person thinks this is a good idea I feel sorry for them. Notice how he picks November which is close to the new year and Christmas as well as begin lose to his final year. Throwing all his debt issues onto the next sorry sod. Man people are screwed up in today’s time.

  • kimmyincali


  • kimmyincali

    Oh geeeeez…there weeeeeee go again! It’s all Bush’s fault!!!!!!!

  • BO/OBama

    Would it be because their obligations exceed their income?

  • Django

    It’s like being a slave!

    How does it feel to be Obama’s slave?!

  • Rachel Jantell

    You know the White House releases speeches ahead of time to selected media outlets? (And Obama doesn’t write them — he just reads them off the autocue, the two big piece of glass to his left and right).


  • DerpDerpDerp

    “your” (and sentences begin with a captial letter)

  • Leathers

    Carlos, why you no reply to my texts?

    Is it because I has the AIDS now?

  • Boogar

    Wait are you saying it is real?! Or it isn’t real?
    #sarcasm is hard

  • Rush Lim Ba

    Unfortunately, Obama announced today that he has changed his mind and this program has been cancelled.

    Sorry about that.

  • Drunken Sailor

    They just borrow the money. Obama has borrowed twice as much in one term as Bush did in two terms. It doesn’t matter — it’s just paper!

    OB did say Bush was unAmerican for borrowing so much — but but was different: he was standing for election, so we must expect politicans to stretch the truth.

    If anything, I blame Bush for not borrowing enough. He if he’d borrowed as much as Obama per term (which would be four times as much as he actually did borrow) maybe this country wouldn’t be in the mess it’s in now.

    (We would be in 38 trillion dollars of debt instead of just the 18 trillion we owe now, but like I said — it’s just paper!)

  • Concerned Tax Payer

    I said “I want fries with that!”

  • Sum Ting Wong

    Some of it. Other parts – not so much.

  • The Wascist

    “a bunch of pasty internet-addicted lonely white guys”

    That’s wascist!

  • The Wascist

    That’s wascist!

  • Martin

    Yo that page been moved fool

    Where the dam page at?!

  • What Is Reality?

    Either the speech is real or the reporting of the speech is real.

    It’s one of the two. It can’t be both.

  • John

    Obama never tells the truth

  • Alisha Stoewer

    how is being friends with someone who cannot afford their student loan being friends with the wrong people??? I would love to just be able to pay my rent on time without struggling! I have a 4 year degree and can not even get a job! Been looking for over a year with no luck in anything! I have loan companies harrassing me on a daily basis and threatining my family! I am over 60k in debt from student loans and am in a Maters program which is going to lead me to being about 90k in debt when I am done. I will basically be owned by the governement the rest of my life! I am also going into a field that doesnt even pay that much (mental health) so even with a masters I am not guarenteed to live “comfortable” I will struggle even with a masters on finding a job and paying loans! And before you say, “oh well why are you going to school for something that doesnt pay” well its my passion and what I want to do with my life and unfortunetly that means being held down by the government for student loans!

  • Gibs Me Dat

    aka you like it when they make fun of Republicans but not Democrats

    Also, “fake news you wish was true”

  • Alisha Stoewer

    I am in the same situation! I have a BA working on my MA and I cant get a job to save my life! I get some interviews and they are for jobs that I know that I can do and am qualified for, but always get that rejection letter saying they hired someone with more experience. I have been out of school for over a year and have had maybe 3 or 4 interviews out of hundreds of resumes sent out! I dont know how the government expects me to pay back my 64k in debt for my undergrad when I cant even get a job other than waiting table (something I am extremely over qualified for) its all bullshit!

  • nurseericka

    Perhaps if the government would have kept their paws out of the student loan business in the first place, the interest rates would not have increased from 3% to > 7% and even higher in some cases.

  • Curtis

    over inflated as the cost of education is, I took those loans knowing
    the cost. As an investment in myself and future it is paying off. But I knew what I wanted to do, I knew what I would make, I busted my but every Summer at internships to make sure I had experience to buff my resume and give me great interview points. I will
    repay my loans for the same reason I didn’t claim bankruptcy when times
    were hard before: I hold myself accountable and responsible for the
    things I promise to repay. Very few engineering majors, or majors with
    definite and clear marketable job skills, will have difficulty repaying
    their loans. The only problem is that they give the loans regardless of
    the real market value of a given degree and everyone is drinking in the
    BS cool-aide that any degree is going to repay you in future income and
    it is just not true. At the end of the day many degrees will simply
    increase your chances of getting an interview (if that) and the rest is
    up to the person trying to get the job. I am surprised by how many people took this seriously and thought it was a good idea. That
    people would even think this was real is an alarming sign, both that
    our education financing system is broken and our education system with
    it, and that people no longer feel responsible to repay their debts.
    When did we all become children that don’t know any better even when we
    are adults? I agree in extreme circumstances there should be assistance, but forgiveness of this magnitude is ludicrous.

  • Curtis

    Agreed. Every time the gov gets involved in something it screws it up. Then people look to the gov again to fix it. Its a disgusting predictable cycle that ends when our population is reduced to a state of infantile wish fulfillment waiting for mommy gov to rescue us from ourselves. But everyone that took out student loans knew exactly what they were getting themselves into, if they actually read the documents and paid attention to the mandatory loan counseling. If they didn’t that’s on them regardless of the higher interest rates.

  • Nay

    Stimulus checks?

  • Nicksaint

    Deserve has nothing to do with it. We are seeing a huge bubble developing on a magnitude similar to the mortgage crisis. Action needs to be taken because to continue to ignore the problem risks mass loan default and another credit freeze/depression.

  • Concerned American

    First of all. Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Mark Zuckerberg and 20% of all other billionaires dropped out of college.

    Second of all I’m sending a letter to my bank that reads Obama says “Just because someone borrowed a bunch of money doesn’t mean they have to pay it back” so that is why I’m not paying my mortgage anymore and if they have a problem with it take it up with him.

  • Concerned American

    So if someones passion is to do drugs we should subsidize that too?

  • cubanflowers

    how come a child fresh out of h.s qualifies for a loan…..

    but many times a hard working adult who applies for a loan and is with.. ok to good credit… is turned down…??…

    that’s what i don’t understand about the american higher education system and these loans….

    therefore i believe it is all a scam designed to keep you people in debt..

    if this country truly cared about the advancement of it’s citizens…. higher education would be free.. …

    forcing children into debt before many even know what their testicles and ovaries are used for is…. a .. SCAM!..

    if there is a budget to make sure people in say countries… like israel.. are able to eat… EDUCATE their children….. make guns for other countries …. etc….

    then there should be a budget here for the american children to be educated for FREE!….

    america’s education system on all levels is a failure …

    if you people go to other countries you will see that the children there are so much smarter….

    *not just academically either!…

    our education surpasses america’s by leaps and bounds!….

    be blessed..

  • Juliana

    How much more can our country afford to give away before it comes to a screeching halt and no one has anything at all??????????

  • Daniel

    He is saying this because he basically just saying these people made it successful more than anyone without a degree so why should we pay for a degree if millionaire made it without one degree and didn’t need to prove to get one.

  • ThunderKing

    Blame your community organizer who knows nothing about job creation.

  • ThunderKing

    DOn;t have families until you can afford them. Pay off your debt first. Best way to start a life. No debt, no real worries.

  • Tonda Tspec Jones-boyland

    that would be wonderful if it would pass…. this prevents a lot of people from doing other things.

  • Trill

    All hail PRESIDENT BARACK OBAMA.now watch someone white find fault

  • Mike

    Scary thing is there are people who think this would actually be a good idea.

  • http://billslater.com/bp William Slater

    If this really happens, I have a strange feeling that student loan debtors will end up paying federal and state taxes on the forgiven student loans.

  • John

    Alisha, it is a standard canned response to say, “we have hired someone with more experience”.

    Have you have interviewer/ interviewing skills work shops? Body language etc. etc.

    Have you structured your resume(s) to target specific companies/ positions you are sending them to? It seems obvious the current one might not be working out for you.

    Have you done any research on the companies you are interviewing for? stock prices, how they began, future outlook etc.. A little buy in and knowledge on the front end and a few questions for the interviewer on the back end are essential. Not, “you answered all my questions”. Do you talk to much or to little, fidget, slouch, Dressed for the part? Looked kept, hair one color, Is the car you drove to the interview neat, clean, and tidy? Laugh, but some do look. I do. It is a reflection of you.
    I have to make a hiring decision based on limited information and having never seen you work. I will use every tool or trick I can use within the legal guidelines to make such a decision.

    Are you currently working at all? If not currently working even the job you do not want or are extremely over qualified, Your chances drop dramatically if you are not. If you are working do you bad mouth the current position/ manager you hold during the interview(s). I do not want you talking about me in that way.
    Does your education hamper available hours for which you can work, and match what availability they need? Perhaps it is just not a good fit in that aspect?!

    Apply to those jobs you feel you are “extremely over qualified” for. For nothing else the interviewing experience. Become a professional interviewee first.

  • Anondw

    I see what you did there.

  • CP

    So your argument is that because something is your passion, you should be able to buy $90k worth of education for it and expect a job on the other side? My passion is postmodern Moldovan literary analysis. Should I blame the government that there simply isn’t a job market for that?

  • Boopstergrams

    You have a four year degree and still you cannot spell ? This is REALLY sad !

  • confused

    what about us in school now??? I wont graduate until April 2014. Will mine be forgiven??? or are we paying for our loans after we finish with 50k in debit in the next couple of years???

  • ranchdancer

    Satire with truths nestled between the lines …just maybe….this tyrant is capable of pulling some pretty devious BS…right before our eyes…like Benghazi, Extortion 17 and ACA lies and cover-ups…and he doesn’t bat an eye.

  • ranchdancer

    who twisted your arm to become so indebt…you bought it now find a way to pay for it. I am tired of all the whining.

  • realistic

    while i enjoy the satire, this article makes a good point that college has become overrated and overvalued, not to say i don’t value education but why is the solution to not being able to find a job after a 4 year degree and all that debt, to go back and add more debt with no more guarantee of finding a job in the first place?? there are plenty of ways to make money in this world with out a degree as this article highlighted. people need a reality check, just like the government, you can’t spend money endlessly on credit with no consequences.

  • dacaria

    Satire at its heart is used to ridicule, it doesn’t have to be funny. Look up irony and Juvenalian.

  • Castillo183

    Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, and Zuckerberg drop out of school.

  • ranchdancer

    oh yes, good old Karma…just remember the generation you want to saddle with all this debt of yours…..will be caring for you in later years, only problem is, by that time, you libs will have run out of other peoples money, the country will be a chite hole.

  • Darth Obama

    The force is strong in this one…

  • John Michael Runyon

    I certainly agree that action needs to be taken. Schools need to stop convincing everyone that four year degrees from expensive colleges are how you get a decent job. Going to a community college for at least part of your education is something that should be stressed. There are many alternatives to a traditional college education that yield decent paying jobs without six figure debt. I am a bartender for example. It is a persons own fault if they get into a bloated field that here is no demand for and go into debt to do so. The people I mainly have a problem with definitely have a sense of entitlement. I should have my mistake solved by other people because it would be really nice for me is entitlement. My main point is that just eliminating the debt with a wave of the hand is not the answer.

  • SourPea

    My only hope is that this is actually some sort of joke.

  • cellima

    I didn’t think Obama was dumb enough to say all that, but for a moment I got carried away with hope and wasn’t sure.

  • Tonya

    Please check out my website. There is money out there to be made. http://www.weeklypaychecksforall.com

  • stooopid

    Really ?!?… all of you college educated people reading this and BELIEVING it need to be dope slapped ! Sad state of our future that anyone even thinks this is credible.

  • stooopid

    That they did !! Just another ideological entitlement of most of our young people today . I went to college and deserve a 90k job right out of the gate. Sheesh .. have they not heard of work your way up the ladder !!

  • Cornellia Watson

    Same situation Alisha. I basically feel like a prisoner to the government. I can’t even sleep at night. But agreed with you the most!

  • stooopid

    But I would bet my life when Bill Gates or Steve Jobs were reviewing resumes for potential employees, they were looking for people who used proper grammar and could form a complete sentence.

  • stooopid

    Nothing in life is guaranteed; only death . Deal with it.

  • Tyrone Hattix

    Thank you Alisha for at least putting forth the effort to do what you can to help others. I’m a soldier on my 5th year long deployment in combat. All I can say people in your field help us out in so many ways most wouldn’t even understand. I know this doesn’t mean much or probably not even anything to you, but thank you for doing what you do so that I can do what I do. You are very much appreciated ma’am. I’m so very sorry that you’ve had to struggle in order to do it.

  • The Yeti

    Unfortunately, people without a college education might be stupid enough to believe this article… or anything that the President actually promises, for that matter.
    (Sarcasm on the “without a college education” part, of coarse;)

  • are you kidding me

    Did you ever think that while you were “learning” how to maybe do the job, he was DOING it! He schooled and educated himself in his position and probably worked his way up to the position which appears you feel should just be GIVEN to you? Because why, you got good grades for a position you’ve never actually performed? I did and do work my butt off to get where I am. I have eaten my fair share of crow to get here. Try learning a little humility and also working hard at the job/ career that pays you.

    You’re entitled to nothing, you also need to earn that like everything else. I am glad to see so few, your words, feel the way Carena and you do. That within itself should show how convoluted your thinking is. It doesn’t reflect on you as being a real smart person for being someone who claims to be so educated.

  • Law

    I think auto-correct substituted Student Loan when they mean Corporate Loans.

  • Trudy Hill

    Ha wonder how many dummies will not send their November payment .

  • knowledgeispower
  • Mick Beers



  • Guest

    “Just because someone borrowed a bunch of money doesn’t mean they have to pay it back”
    Wow. I’m a college student, but this is the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard, and I wouldn’t be surprised if he really did say this.

  • QuackPack12

    People, this is a joke. Quit freaking out. All those famous rich guys he listed are college drop-outs.

  • Guest

    Actually, satire isn’t always supposed to be funny. There is a difference between humor and ridicule. Bet you got all excited about your student loan and are now very disappointed and feeling foolish.

  • Navybrat

    Are you disappointed because you thought you wouldn’t have to pay back your student loan? BTW, humor isn’t a requirement of satire. Who told you it is supposed to be “funny”?

  • Truly S.

    This has to be the unfunniest “satirical” article The Daily Currant has ever published. I’m an adult, and I’m in student loan debt now to help me retrain for another career, because I seriously believe I will never find a job in my old one again (too old). I hope to have my loans forgiven after 10 years of working in the public sector and faithfully making payments. By then I will be 62 years old. I thought my FIRST college degrees would be enough to assure me of gainful employment at some place or other until I was ready to retire. Not true. I feel for all the young people who are going deeply into debt just to get their first degrees. Not all of them are going to be hedge-fund managers who can easily repay their debts. Not all of them are getting what you guys obviously consider to be “impractical” degrees (for some reason, women’s studies always comes in for this kind of attack–sexist much?). They just want to get jobs and make a good living that will help them become debt-free someday. They don’t expect their student loans to be forgiven, they just want to be able to pay them off. In the meantime, people in other countries don’t have to go into debt to get degrees, because their governments see the value of an educated populace and don’t require people who aren’t rich to go deeply into personal debt to afford college. The Daily Currant obviously needs to learn the first rule of comedy: Punch UP, not down. Make fun of the haves–not the have-nots!

  • Nick

    Obama was not at “Scranton University” because 1: there is no such a place ( its the University of Scranton, if you plan to publish an article at least get the facts correct), and 2: He was at the Lackawanna College. Thank you for disrespecting all those who attend the University of Scranton, and misleading all of the readers of this article.

  • Navybrat

    No, YOU are really sad, especially in view of the name you go by. She said “comfortable” instead of “comfortably” and you post that she “cannot spell”?? Are you trying to overcome low self-esteem at someone else’s expense? You just made yourself look like a fool.

  • fed up

    Whatever happened to working your way through college?? Its not meant to ne a 4 year party fest with no responsinilities. Many of us worked hard and didn’t take out loans. Why should you be paid to be lazy???

  • Navybrat

    Jealous because you aren’t, Frida?

  • what?

    beyond clearly not understanding satire, you are saying that students should work their way through college (making upwards of 50k a year @ 18), because taking out loans is for lazy people?

  • Navybrat

    At least he knows how to look things up. And he doesn’t say things like “gettin” or put a semi-colon inside of a parenthesis for no apparent reason, then capitalize Has when it should be lowercase. That is, unless you were attempting to start a new sentence with Has, which is not considered the proper way to begin a sentence.

  • Navybrat

    Frida’s just jealous!

  • Navybrat

    Thank you for this!!!

  • Navybrat

    She didn’t say she wanted a 90k job right away. She is looking for any job in her field. If you paid attention to what she was saying before commenting you would know this. She expects to spend the rest of her life paying back the loan, so that she can work in the field of her choice, mental health. I think it’s commendable that she chose a low-paying field and still wants to further her education and increase her debt to become the best she can be. Better work on your reading comprehension.

  • Navybrat

    Duh!!!! What was your first clue?

  • woodgrain

    Right, and who’s pocket will the money come out of,ours? Richard cranium.

  • Bah Humbug

    Well heck , if only he had such power. Took congress and the prez to bail out the too big to fail to the tune of over 4 trillion. So time for the little guy to get bailed out and not just the rich guys that write off their losses anyhow.

  • Alan Williams

    The problem…is that this is something president Obama would actually say lol….Satire should be a little more obvious if you don’t want people to react. The sad fact is that he would actually say this!!!

  • aintbelievingit

    I say Obamadon’tcare. He just says what he thinks we will like and it’s another empty promise.

  • ain’tbelievingit

    I haven’t whined about paying back the student debt. I believe that I made the right choice to get a college degree. I’m just tired of people who WILL NOT work being in a better financial situation. Whether it is gov’t assistance, robbing houses, or selling drugs. Maybe I should have talked to these folks prior to borrowing money for a college education!

  • Nicksaint

    You need to get over your knee-jerk personal accountability issues. I agree it will suck to have to bail out kids that took on irresponsible loans; however, that may become a necessity, lest mass defaults cause another credit freeze.

  • Sabr

    What I’ve been thinking reading through many of these messages. Add in, why do people bother running up SO much in student loans for “dime a dozen” degrees that end up with limited job opportunities? I don’t hear many chemists, computer programmers, etc having a hard time finding jobs to pay their student loans back.

  • Abide_with_Me

    Jesus God, people! Don’t you understand that this site is 100% satire? It says so right on the header! The leeches think they’ll get off scot free, as usual. All hail Dear Leader! Bwahahahahaaaa! What maroons!

  • Abide_with_Me

    Another dimbulb “college student” who doesn’t understand SATIRE. Ya gotta love it!

  • Abide_with_Me

    Get over yourself – it’s hysterical just watching all you libtards and leeches praising Dear Leader for letting them off another hook!

  • Abide_with_Me

    Seems to me the “stupid” ones are all the college students praising Obama for this, dumbass.

  • Abide_with_Me

    Yeah – you do that, moron:)

  • Abide_with_Me

    Apparently your college education didn’t include a course in SATIRE. The ENTIRE SITE is satire – get it?

  • Sean Newhouse

    So… are you mad at the government because capitalism is failing you? That’s the vibe I got from your post.

  • Adam Knapp

    “So your argument is that because something is your passion, you should be able to buy $90k worth of education for it and expect a job on the other side?”

    No, the argument is that education shouldn’t cost 90K, and that everything shouldn’t be simply enslaved to a fickle economic system. A society which only values monetary ideals will inevitably lose sight of its culture. This isn’t to say that the government should simply fund a 100k degree in moldovan literary analysis, but getting a real education consists of so much more than just learning some job skill for a corporate schmuck.

  • doucher

    You’re an idiot. Everyone makes typos and the majority of people who read blogs understand this. It’s the context that is intelligent, something you probably know nothing about…

  • james


  • TigrisEuphrates

    In case you are broke because of your student loans and were filled with hope after reading this “article”, here is what the President said: “Let’s tell another one million students that when they graduate, they will be required to pay only 10 percent of their income on student loans, and all of their debt will be forgiven after 20 years –- and forgiven after 10 years if they choose a career in public service, because in the United States of America, no one should go broke because they chose to go to college.” – President Barack Obama, January 27, 2010

  • John

    It would be funny if it was not remotely possible. With Obama in office, it’s a distinct possibilty that he would try to do this. If we write off that debt, we are basically taking that money from everyone who trades with the US dollar. England did just that back in the late 60′s and nearly overnight the Sterling Pound fell out of favor as the world’s trading currency and the UK became mired in a deep recession for decades. That is how the US Dollar rose to become the world’s trading currency….. we had growth and prosperity for decades. Don’t think for one second that the Chinese Yuan isn’t being touted as the US Dollar replacement. In fact, several countries that trade heavily in US Dollars have begun to use the Yuan. Any futher misteps with the value of the dollar, like to continue printing up money as “debt”, will hasten the switch to the Yuan. If that happens there will be no money to pay the entitlement hoards and because we can’t print up more money, guess what will happen next…….

  • TigrisEuphrates

    and another one blames the undocumented immigrants… just toss it on the pile of all the other vapid egocentric decadent fallacious preconceived nonsense…

  • Adam Knapp

    Yeah, it’s totally the illegal aliens taking all these lucrative farm jobs, part-time day labor, and meat processing plant cleaning positions. It has nothing to do with greedy corporations laying off thousands of Americans and sending their jobs to China, and DEFINITELY has nothing to do with those now-unemployed workers trying to take what jobs they can.

  • Mir

    Zuckerburg and Gates dropped out

  • Adam Knapp

    If he would actually say this, then why hasn’t he said it? Personally, I think there needs to be at least some type of debt forgiveness. People don’t seem to realize that most of this is the result of corporate profiteering, not just “lazy students trying to get a free handout.”

  • Adam Knapp

    With the state of the education system here, it will be many years before someone invents a rocket that can do that. In fact, that future scientist probably just had to major in business or banking instead of engineering, since many companies are bringing in educated foreigners because they can pay them less and work them harder (You better put in all 70 hours this week if you want us to renew your visa!).

  • Wizyrd

    Does this mean I can get a refund for the student loan I stupidly paid back? While we’re at it can I get “forgiven” for a mortgage? I really could use a house…… Oh, and lest I forget, I have a few payments left on the car……

  • theFOOL

    And some dumb fools will fall for that

  • Inkedchic

    did I take a wrong turn and end up in an english class???? If it mattered, I am sure it would be correct… we are on a damn forum people… who gives a damn… ever heard of typo, people make mistakes… especially when they allow their emotions to take over they’re fingers on a keyboard. Worry about something other than being a grammer po po… we have enough of that crap on every other site available…. when all else fails and you can’t think of anything to say, bash them with spelling and grammatical errors… LMAO

  • Immigrant

    It feels like someone has suddenly disagreed with himself. Defending content at first and now typo… Interesting

  • http://www.ampmseo.com/ Ed Luvables

    I never said I was cool, and Lucien never said he knew anything. Your problem is within. If you need to grab a drink or fire up a doob to relax, go ahead and do that, I won’t judge.

  • Alan Williams

    Debt forgiveness is a slippery slope. Nothing is ever free. That 1 trillion dollars is built into the federal budget as revenue. So if 1 trillion disappeared that the government was counting on….the budget goes out the window and now they have to re-work everything. Ultimately the tax-payers will get stuck with the bill and not the banking institutions. But this is only yet another symptom of having a monetary system that isn’t backed by anything of any real value.

  • Bill

    While I agree with the general premise the article is driving at (that students carrying loan debt made and obligation and should be accountable) I think the author misses some key points. For one, since Obama and big gov is in the habit of bailing out wall-street, big banks, and dramatically overpaying themselves/politicians, the money would be BETTER spent on students. Additionally, as the article pointed out sarcastically, students made a promise to pay back and it’s silly to assume they should simply be freed from their responsibility. But, educators and universities made a promise too, and a crap education with little real life applicability or job skills wasn’t one of them.

  • Rick Tschernjawski

    So thats it go to school and don’t pay back your loans . Whats another
    trillion tacked on to the deficit . The end of America is in sight . And
    most likely before this idiot leaves office .

  • Mac

    Satire dude. Not a real article.

  • 2pieces

    This will definitely change the landscape of education and surely disrupt the system.. wow..just wow

  • Rodacious ThreeStacks

    The government should pay for school. Between the federal, state and local governments, they can take up to half of a person’s income, then they get 8-9 percent when you spend the half you have left, then if you try to invest it, they get 17% of the profits from that. Why shouldn’t they pay for the education up front if they are going to take half the money for the rest of your life. If you pay for everything yourself (plus interest), why do you owe them anything? Even a pimp buys his hookers clothes, a place to stay, protects them and sends them to the doctor because those are his assets.

  • Guest

    I can’t wait to be completely debt free!

  • Guest

    Actually, it’s not!

  • Obama

    me too!

  • Adolph

    You have a four-year degree and you cannot use hyphens? This is REALLY sad!

  • Obama Himself

    You’re right!

  • TommyRockit

    So do we send a Bill/Invoice to the White House for those of us that already paid ours off!?!

  • jennenah

    Look up Public Service Loan Forgiveness. 120 on time payments and the rest of your loans are forgiven. Going into mental health, you are bound to find some sort of employment that would qualify a public service.

  • 666threesixes666

    student loans are predatory.

  • Brandon

    How is forgiving your student loan going to get you a job?

    How is forgiving your student loan going to help your field get a better salary?

    Is the real problem you paying the loan off or you getting a job?

  • Adam

    If you truly don’t have the income to pay your loan then get a deferment… student loans are one of the easiest types of loans to pay back so long as you’re not the kind of person that just ducks bill collectors when they call. They’ll analyze your financial situation and if you are truly experiencing economic hardship, not only will they defer the payments but they can also put a temporary hold on the interest charges that accrue over time. Basically what I’m saying is work with the loan company and they’ll work with you. If you’re stressed over a student loan then you’re doing something horribly wrong!

  • Adam

    I’ll copy/paste my response to Alisha…

    “If you truly don’t have the income to pay your loan then get a deferment… student loans are one of the easiest types of loans to pay back so long as you’re not the kind of person that just ducks bill collectors when they call. They’ll analyze your financial situation and if you are truly experiencing economic hardship, not only will they defer the payments but they can also put a temporary hold on the interest charges that accrue over time. Basically what I’m saying is work with the loan company and they’ll work with you. If you’re stressed over a student loan then you’re doing something horribly wrong!”

  • Adam

    Perhaps half the problem is you thinking that you’re too good to wait tables? I don’t care what degree you have, a job is a job. Do what it takes in this life to be self sufficient!

  • Greg Bott

    Like to see the 50g’s I paid back in my pocket… but its been a while since I have seen a unicorn farting rainbows.

  • shavonne

    Oh and Alisha I also found out that if you work a public service job for 10 years which I know you are much more qualified your student loan debt will be wiped out. After 25 years if you stay on a payment plan the loans will be wiped out. That is a very long time. This is information I received when I was trying to figure out what to do about my loans.

  • von

    There are people that a leaching on the gov’t I personally don’t agree with that. I have an MBA in Finance, but I have not been able to find a job that will pay me what I’m worth. I’ve been told over an over again that I need to create one, so I am with God’s help with student loan debt and everything else. All I can say is that God is helping me make it through it.

  • shavonne

    I think the importance lies in both.

  • von

    From a financial standpoint this can be good or bad. This is good for the person that has the loan, but I believe it will be bad for the economy in the long-term. I personally have student loans, but I’m coming up with creative ways to try and pay them off. Has it been easy??? The answer is absolutely not!!! I’ve had to take forbearances…I recently started blogging to make extra income. http://www.ibourl.net/myslksuccess

  • von

    There are other ways as well, if you need more information just visit the link. I’m more than willing to share.

  • Jackie


  • Jackie


  • missmonica

    Вы нуждаетесь в частные или бизнес-кредитов для различных целей? Если да, свяжитесь через это письмо … [email protected]
    Необходимое количество:

  • Lance

    your wife Kelly is going to be your x-wife Kelly if she doesn’t learn to control herself

  • http://betamaxmas.com/ Major Domo

    Shrug…satire or not…we give more than this to other countries every year so I am actually for this idea. For once, Americans would benefit. I’m sure those jets and tanks we gave the Muslim brotherhood in Egypt would go a long ways towards paying off some debt.

  • ChuckN007

    Let’s just make everything free.

  • doug

    Bill Gates did not graduate from college… lol


    “In today’s economy a university education is more important than ever. Where would successful people like Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Tom Hanks, Brad Pitt or Mark Zuckerberg be without their college diplomas.” They NEVER graduated. People use your thinking caps!

  • Dumass

    I win the idiot award. I took hard earned savings to pay for my children to go to college. Also had them work and contribute. I need to quit the republican party, quit working, and sign up to ‘get mine’ — after all, I was born an American and deserve to be taken care of by the government.


    Canadians have GREAT schools! Their government also subsidizes the STUDENTS not the Banks. I met people who would take out $5k per year for room, board, etc., work in the summer paid it off and graduated virtually debt free. The student loan game in America is a racket! No longer does a college education mean guaranteed employment. However, that has not stopped tuition from rising exponentially! SUBSIDIZE STUDENTS NOT BANKS!!!! Take that to a Republican Congress.

  • aprildot

    It is impossible for us not to pay back our loans. If we didn’t the world would be broke. Nothing in life is free people.

  • scragsma

    Agreed. If you can’t get the job you want, take what job you can get and pay what you owe while looking for a better job. Most employers prefer to hire someone who’s already working rather than someone who isn’t.

    Nobody guaranteed it would be easy – but you signed the contract, you need to honor it.

  • Ben Carroll

    It takes an incredible degree of stupidity to mistake this for anything other than satire. It takes an even more incredible degree of stupidity to try to look dignified doing it.

  • scragsma

    Yes, unfortunately it’s the kind of thing that’s right in line with what Obama has done and might still do.

  • scragsma

    Uh…”you’re” (you are) is correct, Derp…

  • scragsma

    God bless, you, ‘Frustrated’ – I wish all those with student debt understood the issue that well and took proper responsibility.

  • Ben Carroll

    thanks for rooting that one out for us…

  • Ben Carroll


  • st

    Why don’t we just make college education free while we’re at it? I think this is stupid. It’s wrong to say “you don’t necessarily have to pay back your LOANS”. Why not make college education AFFORDABLE so that people don’t suffer in debt for many years.

  • Terry Rose

    Once a Loser always a Loser

  • AllisonDD

    People are taking this seriously, and THAT’S horrifying!

  • Sirus

    You have to pay for deferments. Lone companies make you pay for your deferment. Mine charges 100$ for just three months. If I had 100$ I would be paying them.

  • missanthropy

    why do you people love to hate on one another? Just be happy this is going to happen and talk about something positive for once.

  • Sirus

    I will repet here what I said up there, Deferments cost money, if you don’t have the money to pay them then where are you going to get money for that three month deferment? My lone company charges 100$ for just three months, and they charge it every three months or they start to threaten you.

  • Sirus

    If you want to blame someone, how about you actually blame the people who do the bill making, It is not the president, or did you not pay attention in Government? He can only tell them yes or no if the bill will go threw. It is all congress. Mmm look at that there its your tea party buddies! What do you know.

  • Sirus

    You say they are counting on it, but how can you count on money you are not even seeing at all? You make plans for money you don’t have in your hands? That sounds very foolish. If you don’t know what you will be getting then you wait till you have it. You sound foolish with your own money if your doing math and spending it before you actually get it.

  • Mary

    Is this for real? Wow, if it is how is it going to work now if people want to go back to school?

  • Andy

    Deferment only goes so far. I luckily have been able to pay my monthly payment. I have deferred a few times on my private loans, but every time I do so the minimum payment goes up when I start to repay them again. When I started to repay the loan the payment was about $500/month. I went through 2-3 deferment periods and they are now close to $800/month. Thank you Sallie Mae!

  • Continuing Student

    Most of these comments are bullshit. If you look at other countries, they don’t have the astronomical debt tied to an individual getting a degree. The real issue is the colleges and universities who are able to name their own price when it comes to tuition and fees. Years ago, a bachelors degree would get you far, now its almost a requirement if you are going to get something past McDonalds. Blaming a student who almost has no other choice but to get this degree who is unable to get a job is the wrong response. I don’t claim to like everything this president has put out, but at least he is trying to fix the issue. We need to embrace this and move on.

  • JennieK

    OMG I always hated Obama and never voted for him but if he does this hes awesome!!! My old student loans from 15 years ago have ruined my credit STILL!!!! and I never get my taxes back, but the worst thing is I cant even prove I went to college and got a BA bx they withhold the college transcripts!!!…..this would be sooooo awesome but its probably fake like people said. Obama, if you do something like this and just erase the student loans, I totally apologise and will totally be on your side!!!!!

  • YoungGrad

    My fiancee has her MSW, so I can understand where you are coming from with your desire to want to help people, but I do have to say something I told her: “You should be helping yourself before trying to help others.”

    I understand that your passion is to help people, but how does it make any sense to put yourself nearly $100k into debt just to make $25-30k per year until you get your license? College, like most anything else, is a business decision, as in “Does it make sense to go to school for X period of time and take on X amount of debt to earn X in future potential income.”

    The sad truth is that in an economy like ours and where jobs are as hard to come by for young people, you need to focus on going for degrees will allow them to earn a living and pay back your loans. The degree you choose will likely impact you for the rest of your life. I can’t even begin to count the number of friends I have from college who ended up going to college just because “it’s what people do after high school.” Half of them majored in meaningless degrees and were never able to get a job out of school. A large portion of them got their undergrad degrees and then went straight to law school. What a brilliant idea! Lets go take out another $200k in debt when it’s just as hard for recent law school graduates to find a job.

    The problem with the student debt ballooning out of control is that kids are going to college today just because it’s what they think they are supposed to do. They spend 3 years trying to figure out what major they want, racking up debt, only to graduate and not find a job. Then they end up working a job they could have been doing the whole time without a degree, except now they have 10′s of thousands of dollars in debt saddled to their backs.

  • http://Facebook.com/NewJerZ NJ Roldos

    I just think it is humorous you equated being married or having children an “unexpected issue.” I could really expand on that, but I won’t. I get that students loans are killing people. But you DID agree to pay back that money. And so it is what it is. My solution? Stop making school so damn expensive. I don’t think educating and grooming are future for success justifies the price tag. I just don’t. And then on top of, a large amount of professions don’t even give a fuck if you have a degree or not. They really don’t. I became an overnight manager at a Times Square hotel at the age of 20, and I never even touched Hospitality.

    What is that degree doing for you now? The same thing it did for you before you got it: nothing. Because the truth is, nobody cares. Its up to you to make it happen.

  • jayworland

    Anyone catch The Office reference?? “Ryan Howard, a local paper salesman”
    “My wife Kelly”

  • kimmyincali

    Most of this string of posts are a GREAT example of what happens when Liberals reproduce and send their offspring off to get a college education. Damn scary how CLUELESS some of you little trolls are!!!

  • kimmyincali

    Hmmmm?…you think so huh? I worked for a Bio-tech company until I started my own business, that was hiring them in bio-tech positions because they could pay them $12 an hour instead of $20+ so show’s just how much YOU know about the REAL illegal employment picture dumbasses. And as a Supervisor, personally brought it to the attention of Human Resources that documents looked questionable. They have just recently been investigated for the practice…. La de da….keep living in your liberal bubble of a dreamworld! Haha!

  • kimmyincali

    Awwww…someone learned some new big words! Sorry but in this case they don’t make you appear more intelligent….just clueless ;)

  • TimeToWakeUp

    This is an idiot’s logic. You just said that, because the degree costs $90k, no one should do it. Period.

    There is a job market for mental health professionals, the problem is the pay doesn’t scale with the cost of the education required for it. Not only that, but when you graduate with that debt, companies won’t hire you because they’ve been told that you’re a liability by ignorant people like you.

  • TimeToWakeUp

    Actually, having student loan debt will keep you from getting a job, in TWO ways:

    A lot of companies are told by financial analysts that graduates carrying large student loan debts are a liability and should not be hired.

    When you are working a menial labor job making $2,000 a month and your student loan payments total $1,350 a month you spend a very large amount of time unable to properly job hunt. You ever tried surviving on less than $700 a month before rent, utilities, food… ?

  • TimeToWakeUp

    Maybe the plan should be to forgive private student loan debt ;) I jest, but in all honesty, most of the companies who handle private student loans are pure evil.

  • snk

    Thank you Mr. President , and this is coming from a current college student .

  • luis

    This can and should be possible. We can no longer condemned to our future generations, especially students, who bring their knowledge to help others in our society. It is impossible, before finishing their studies are liable, and when they ask for deferral, without work, charge high interest. We are killing the dreams of our students.
    Education can not be a dream-crushing business. Do Obama, help your nation.

  • dude

    Repay the loans of college students from all your banker friends obama

  • Laverne

    Satire…plus those people he mentioned did not get college degrees…..

  • Ray Itz

    First… Come on everyone, that site is a poking fun. Really forgive? What has our country become a bunch of moochers…expecting everything for free? Seriously! The “Government” is not a magical money tree growing cash… it’s your neighbor, friend, relative paying taxes. And you want them to pay for your college… may as well point a gun at them and rob them. You borrow money you pay it back…period. Now if you’re asking for low interest rates..ok, but not to pay back the principal… that’s just idiotic!!!

  • Alan Williams

    No one ever said the government was smart! And the twisted world of accounting is even worse…. Like I said before…the entire global monetary system is not even real. It is backed by nothing but the feeble promise of the United States that we are good for it. That is the root of the problem.

  • Geoffrey Waumans

    Oh please! Satirical commentary for a satirical article. Grow a pair and stop crying over my “Nazi-ism”. And, for “Mr. Sucks”, who created an anonymous account just to admonish me, the following message is for him:

    Thanks for immortalizing me Mr. Sucks! Here’s another fragment. Takes a douche bag to know one! Oh, and here’s another “DB” moment for ya: Asshole (of which you are a prime example) is one word, not two. Thanks again, Mr. Sucks. Or is it Ms.? (Oops! Another fragment!)

    Thanks to you all for making my day! :)

  • Drew Breess

    nah dont re elect him whatever you do jesus it will be the end of us all i promise! dont fall for it no more come on!!

  • MikeHeXt

    Not funny. Too many people are depressed and trapped in these debts. Some of it even results from fraud thanks to the for-profit college industry. :/

  • Joanne

    God bless #Obama I owe almost $138,500 and working at 10 bucks an hour. I am barely holding on. My husband was an architectural designer for 22 years, and because of the recession; he is now back in college fulltime, because he cannot find fulltime work at the age of 49. I glad to hear he believes in second chances, because this is something I worry about every single day; ‘How will I pay it all back?’

  • Nathan

    If you can’t afford to pay back the loans, I suggest you drop out and get a job. Sorry that we all can’t have the ideal job and the ideal life. Grow up!

  • David Weddell

    Uh… Zuck and Gates dropped out…

  • Saint Ranson

    Awesome work President Obama. As a hardworking graduate student in Communication & Theater, it sometimes gets really hard for me. Being smart… but black.. and a little less fortunate than those who can afford school. I’ve always had the smarts and scholarships to pay for school but once I reached the graduate level, I had to take out loans. There was no other way. It would be great if this could happen! I’m so hopeful for this because I’m working my a word off in grad school and would love to come out of the experience without having to pay thousands of dollars. I mean, a few thousands is okay… But with interests rates now, things have gotten out of hand lol!

  • lrf22

    We also spend a hefty amount of welfare and what good has that done?

  • cabledawg

    Is this true or BS??

  • Mark N Starla Traina

    If it sounds too good to be TRUE its 99.99999% of the time “TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE”!

  • LoanHate

    It’s satire but…..it kind of shows how much of a pipe dream it is.

  • Xtina Shelor

    I can only hope this is true. I didn’t have a silver spoon in my mouth and my parents weren’t made of money nor came from money. I simply wanted to break the cycle…. but ended up owing more than I can ever pay …Hope it’s true

  • Jonathan

    Yeah, you live without cable, internet, and a smartphone. You live in a tiny apartment. You add extra blankets if it’s cold, and get a small fan if it’s hot. Don’t eat out. Even the dollar menu is more expensive than what you can make for yourself at home in the kitchen. Take shorter showers and live on a tight budget. It sucks, but you gotta do what you gotta do. I’ve done it.

  • jeff long

    This is not a good idea at all. Though there are a lot of people that would deserve it. There are many that will do what I am about to say. I know someone who has never worked a day in her life. Lives off welfare. Well they sent her to school. So now on top of her welfare she is borrowing 3k a semester with no plans to work, or repay the loans. She says what can they do..she is never going to work, Her credit is already bad so she don’t care of it’s affects. I think there are many more like her out there..And those of us who work are suppose to cover for those people…bs

  • jeff long

    ya..I just wrote a story above about someone I know that has borrowed a LOT of money and never had any plans to repay..I think this is another one of those people.

  • Scott Gurstein

    For someone who likes to portray himself as “traditional/conservative,” CP, you sure do a good job ignoring the fact that traditionally, “in the good old days,” a college education didn’t cost 3x as much as a new home. Philosophy based on selective memory; how come I’m not surprised?

  • Scott Gurstein

    …absolutely, because Congress has nothing to do with economic policy via taxation and spending, and more importantly, because college cost only a few hundred dollars to attend all 4 years before the community organizer came along, then suddenly inflated to $90,000 the day after Inauguration Day, 2009. Yep. Laughing and shaking my head…all at the same time. It hurts!

  • dead fred said

    Who wrote this? Give us a name.

  • roninmd

    The satire in this article backfired. In an
    attempt to satirize the student loan issue, the author winds up getting
    hopeful comments that the article were true. The writer didn’t realize
    that bankruptcy truly needs to be return to student loan debtors or the
    economy will never get out of the hole it’s is in.

  • RoninMD

    The satire in this article backfired. In an
    attempt to satirize the student loan issue, the author winds up getting
    hopeful comments that the article were true. The writer didn’t realize
    that bankruptcy truly needs to be return to student loan debtors or the
    economy will never get out of the hole it’s is in. It wasn’t funny at all. There are millions at people at risk to and will never be able to payback because this kind of debt ruins credit history and consequently prevents people from getting that one job that could have gotten them out of debt.

  • RoninMD

    Voluntary slavery is still slavery and still is a crime against humanity. So who do you go after in a crime like this. You go after the guy that keeps them in debt servitude. Simple.

  • RoninMD

    The satire in this article backfired. In an
    attempt to satirize the student loan issue, the author winds up getting
    hopeful comments that the article were true. The writer didn’t realize
    that bankruptcy truly needs to be return to student loan debtors or the
    economy will never get out of the hole it’s is in.

    It wasn’t funny at
    all. There are millions at people at risk to and will never be able to
    payback because this kind of debt ruins credit history and consequently
    prevents people from getting that one job that could have gotten them
    out of debt.

    It’s slavery and the government has created slaves. That’s a crime.

  • RoninMD

    Just end the Student loan program.

  • roninmd

    The oppositions simple answers and really the best of decision. What you need to do is to stop feeding the beast.

  • roninmd

    No dumbass.. you subsidize rehab.

  • roninmd

    It frees up money that would go to further the US economy that would have otherwise gone to wage garnishment and paid to a fat cat bankers who would speculate on commodities and spend derivatives while crashing the stock market.

  • roninmd

    Well said and that isn’t fair. There should be a law that prevents employers from discriminate against debtors.

  • roninmd

    It’s a ploy to get you to refinance your debt and it actually balloons your debt even further.

  • C

    who made the choice to go into a field that doesn’t pay much? why do lending companies or the government (all of us) would have to pay for your oversight?

  • sfwmson

    does the MD stand for doctor of something? I can see why you’d be a little taken aback by the idea of not having to repay your loans. lol.

  • sfwmson

    how fortunate for you Lucian posted today, since your user name would only be good in that instance. dumbass troll.

  • George K. Cuzakis

    Maybe this has been mentioned but people do realize that everyone he listed in the article as to having college degrees were all college dropouts, i.e. Bill Gates, Jobs, Zuckerberg etc.

  • George K. Cuzakis

    None of those guys graduated

  • Bill

    My friend confided in me that she had been seeing a psychologist every week for the last two years at $125.00 per session. I responded a $125.00 a session, you gotta be nuts.

  • Elane Britt


  • Elane Britt

    I have a degree in Criminal Justice and I had no idea that my past would hinder me, I have been out of school since the late 90′s , I tried for one full year to pay the required minimum, only to come into to the knowledge that as much as I owed, I was not even touching the surface to wipe out my debt and as for a job with my non-tradition enrollment status it was just a piece of the pay for a period, now with the debt about to be forgiven and love that word because I am responsible, but I was also deceive, and still remain broke…thank President Obama, now I might have a shot at the American Dream with this fresh start

  • Disappointed

    I paid all my student loans and worked hard to get clear of debt. With that said, it is very irresponsible of him to post a satire that does not take into consideration the moral implications it will have. What would have been fine as a message among friends was a misdirected message. The childish way you guys handle what people are saying lets me further know your level of maturity. I don’t care what you write after this post and don’t care to read any more from this website.

  • roninmd


  • roninmd

    We were deceived because they didn’t guarantee you a job with a living wage. A student loan is a class of credit called consumer debt and caries the same risk to bankers as a credit card. Consumer loans are supposed to be discharged in bankruptcy in order to keep the economy moving. Without bankruptcy, the economy stagnates. Because student loans can never be discharged, you get an economy that we have now.

  • roninmd

    Frankly, education should be free. Other countries have free higher education so that members become productive members of society and are happy enough to stay and pay taxes.

  • roninmd

    Adam, that’s simple solution that simply doesn’t work.

  • ADT

    I hope this helps…You should look into this..What is the Public Service Loan Forgiveness Program?

    The PSLF Program is intended to encourage individuals to enter and continue to work full-time in public service jobs. Under this program, borrowers may qualify for forgiveness of the remaining balance of their Direct Loans after they have made 120 qualifying payments on those loans while employed full time by certain public service employers.


    What must I do to have any remaining balances on my Direct Loans forgiven under the PSLF Program?

    You must make 120 on-time, full, scheduled, monthly payments on your Direct Loans. Only payments made after October 1, 2007 qualify.

    You must make those payments under a qualifying repayment plan.

    When you make each of those payments, you must be working full-time at a qualifying public service organization.


  • Guest

    Why are huge, multi-national corporations bailed out but people crushed by student loan debt can’t be bailed out?

  • mtb

    Most people also believe Mark Twain supported slavery.

    The entire purpose of satire is to either be hilarious, or make you agree and think the topic is true, only to be used against you later. Some of the greatest orators this nation has ever had took–seemingly–the side of slavery, got the entire crowd rallying with them, then used those same rally cries to overthrow the status quo.

    If this article elicited such a response in the NEGATIVE, look into why it offended you and make changes.

    If this article created that much hope, wake up, come back to reality, and start looking for work. Loans don’t just vanish, this is America, not Narnia.

    And if, like me, you read this and got a good laugh; step away from your machine, contact the relative that instilled a love of knowledge and literature into you, and thank them. Profusely. Actually, don’t contact. Drive, fly, swim, however else you can devise to get there, over to them and make them cookies.

  • DreadedPat

    Sheeeeeeeeeet I was just saying that I should have taken out some student loans.

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  • Dan

    not real, yet Obama might pull that too

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  • Fernando

    I disagree, first, there are many different ways to get a free education based on either your academic merit, athletic merit, etc . Military members can attend almost any institution fully paid as well as their family (almost any institution). So if you really want one you can get one at minimal cost if not for free. Also it is a person’s decision to take a loan, no one is ever forced to take a loan, everyone that has ever taken a loan knows what they are getting into. Even when someone is in the process of taking a loan all of the information regarding repayment and consequences is provided, they dont hide this, and they dont try to. Before you can even accept an educational loan you have to go through entrance counseling and when you graduate you go through exit counseling. They even make you sign a master promissory note, stating that you understand everything and even before that you go through different steps which give you all of the information you need before you can even sign it.

  • Fernando

    So if you consider yourself a slave, then you must also understand that it was you who put yourself in that position and that its no one else’s fault but yours, not the president, not congress, no the states, yours. It is not something the government has created, it is something that you have created, i think most people in this kind of situation should stop blaming the government for what they got themselves into and stop hoping for an easy way out, because at the end of the day its not the government who is going to have to fix your personal problems, it has to be you. I bet most people who took out a loan were not complaining anytime they had received the money or when they received a refund check from the loan, and most people weren’t thankful that it was from that same money they were able to receive a diploma. But as soon as the money was spent and gone thats when the criticism began. Wake up, stop complaining, get out and do something about it, if it means you have to work doing something thats not your dream, welcome to the real world, you cant always get what you want but it doesn’t mean you have to stop do whatever you have to do to put yourself in a better position and then you can reach out for your dreams.

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    AnyTHING WITH oBAMA can count me out Screw this scrum

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    the fact that you typed all this is why this article is funny

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  • vrn2

    So students agree to a contract so that they can learn how to write a contract so that the President can buy votes for Democrats by telling these former students that the people that now own them money don’t have to pay it.

  • Mary Howard

    My student loan was forgiven. When that happens you have to file that on your tax return. I did that. NOW, my loans have been sold to someone else and THEY are billing me. What can I do?

  • Joey Ray

    If only… We all know Obama is a shill for the banks and corporations.

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  • agape

    How dare this administration continue to cripple our economy. Our economy depends on the cash flow from repayment of debt. Do you really think forgiving debt is “free”? It will cost us more..the “cost” is at en expense to you and our country. If edu loans have increased at 600% over x years then so should have our paychecks in order to pay back our debts. If we all owe an average of $24,000 it is really not that much money to pay back over 10 years. You cannot afford $2800 per year?? Come on – fight – Keep our Country on track.

  • insight

    hmm…let’s think here….What does this deal (plan) involve? When you make a deal you have to give something in return. What is the return this time? and If we do not pay our debts back what is the consequence? Will we have to start giving our properties and land to countries that hold our debt? If we live in our houses and own our land then how are they going to get us to move out? Maybe by eminent domain? Eminent Domain can be used to “sell short” our properties for government use or to pay back debt. USA needs YOU to pay back what you signed up for. loveUSA

  • Doreen Andrus

    While it would be nice for all loans for students to be forgiven , lets think now, for something to be given to one person someone else must have to have it taken away , How can a country so far in debt forgive debt ? Education is also an industry where countless people work and receive their livelihoods too . Where is that going to come from ?

  • Precious

    Anyone who read this story and did not recognize the satirical nature should ask for a refund from their university.

  • inquisitive

    Did you go to a for-profit school, by any chance? I went to a tech school and the recruiters got a nice bonus for each student- and reprimanded if they didn’t get enough new people(exactly like credit card sales are handled in retail, actually). You can imagine how this didn’t exactly have the students’ best interests at heart. One person thought she was only taking computer networking courses until nursing courses opened up (there was no nursing program and still isn’t one at that branch, as far as I know). Other students signed up for Criminal Justice courses- the recruiter never asked about their backgrounds, Some people could never get a job ever because they had record–the recruiters never asked this question, so potential students never knew any better. They would graduate with 50k in debt at an incredibly high interest rate with no opportunity to pay this off by working in their field of study. For profit schools do some things right- they exist for a reason. But a HUGE percentage of defaults come from for-profit schools for reasons like yours. It’s not your fault when the system’s rigged.

  • Lifelongdebter

    I wish. I tried that about 20 years ago when I was forced to drop out of college [by circumstances] before getting any degree in a tech school that was not accredited. The student aide office had zero sympathy for my case and would not send the loan back where it came from. So with bad credit, no degree, and nothing but minimum wage and temp agency jobs on my resume – I still owe two decades later. Id be much better off if I had never attempted higher education. :/

  • Blen

    Does anyone else think it is ironic that Ryan the paper salesman from Scranton PA, has an MBA and is married to someone named Kelly? have you ever seen “The Office?”

  • Lorelei Mason

    I went through the same thing with TCI in CT. They refused to return the remainder of my loans, one of which was supposed to be a monthly stipend to assist with my living expenses and not a payment to the school itself. I had to leave school because I was unable to find reliable babysitters, and left at the beginning of the second term. So I paid for an entire year of school, but attended less than 4 months. The government didn’t care about how unfair it was, and I feel that I was defrauded by the school AND American Student Assistance.

  • Lorelei Mason

    My daughter was diagnosed with Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia and had to leave school while she underwent chemotherapy and the numerous hospitalizations. She also had to leave her full time job (she went to school full time as well). When she asked for a deferment it was denied. How is that possible? If they wouldn’t give her one until she was in remission and well enough to work again, how can you expect them to give one to someone who has a financial issue and will default without the deferment? I think they’d rather see someone default and ruin their credit and ability to even get a Pell Grant in the future.

  • TaSaad

    No, satire is not suppose to be funny, it is suppose to make you think! It doesn’t have to be funny!

  • Jenny Lening

    I agree! All levels of education should be free!

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    I was in a critical search of a genuine loan lending company were i can obtain a loan of $85,000.00USD some lender’s that Came to me sheep clothing i never know they where fraud until i was given the terms of their loan and i agreed eventually i was scammed they scammed me of my hard earn money up to four lender’s that scammed me the sum of $32,000.00USD and i though that all is over that there can never be any other genuine lender until my Husband’s Friend Mr. Garrett Lugard the general manager of Cotsat and cotsat company told me that there is a genuine lender that he obtained a loan of 1.5 Million Dollars At 3% interest rate From that makes him own a private business and a house of his own he Referred me to a company Mrs.Lauren Phelps loan Company,Email [email protected] Where he obtained the loan of($1.1 million Dollars) i told them how referred me to them i applied for a loan of $180,000.00USD after my application and i sent to them the useful information for them to process my loan after 4hours i received a notification From their company that my loan has been approved and processed in the next 4hours my loan of $85,000.00 Dollars was transferred into my account. And i promise them for coming to my rescue i am going to spreed the good news to the entire world ABOUT MRS LAUREN PHELPS LOAN COMPANY IS THE BEST IN THE WORLD. And tell them, i Mrs Waiter Kerter,referred you to them and your wish will be fulfilled…

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  • Johnhackley
  • aldousd

    The government isn’t going to make such a law… after all if you are a debtor you are a liability to your employer. For example, the government won’t even grant someone with a big debt a security clearance and if you have one, and go into big debt, they revoke your clearance. If you have a huge debt you’re more susceptible to graft, blackmail, and reckless behavior — both because you allowed yourself to get into that situation to begin with, and because you’re probably looking to get out of it quickly. Be responsible. Your own liabilities affect every aspect of your life. And they should.

  • aldousd

    The high prices of education can only exist as such because the people are able to pay them. Why are they able to pay them? Because student loans are so easy to get. If you make loans more difficult to get, chop government subsidies, then institutions can’t raise prices or they will not have anybody coming in the door. This is a well known fact: anytime you want the price of something to go up, have the government subsidize it. Guaranteed price increase. Make loans easier to get, prices go up. It’s true for housing, and tuition, and well, everything else. Bitch about fairness all you want but math is math, regardless of your politics.

  • susie

    I thought I heard Obama say that in a speech,that all student loans are forgiven.

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  • http://groups.yahoo.com/group/EvidencefortheBible/ Galut1


  • Jj Chen

    Would have been nice. Wouldnt put me in the plus, but would at least make me whole….

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  • phil

    I am Mr.Amao Adeyori the managing director and chief executive officer of FINANCE 4 GROWTH LIMITED.i am a private lender and i gives out Short/long term loans to individuals and cooperate bodies.Having recently expanded our frontiers to Asia,America and some other country,and we’ve granted loans to over 280 individuals, companies and public parastatals in these continents we are still poised to give more out.

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  • asiL

    2 decades of loans here. Interest is piling up. Have a masters degree in mental health. STOP! Don’t continue! I felt like I sold my soul to the devil. Couldn’t find anything in the field that paid more than $28,000 15 years ago so I went into a different field until our first child was born. SO, for 12 years, and one more child I have not been bringing in a pay check. It didn’t make financial sense for me to work and pay for daycare with the crappy salary I was getting. I would have been working to pay for childcare and not been able to pay off anything. Run, don’t walk away from that program.

  • darth_chocula

    alisha, re the serenely oblivious mr. “bla”‘s comment above, i think it was P J O’Rourke who said, “It’s always polite to be rich.” fight satire with satire :)

  • RReaganWasAnIndustryShill

    yeah, those darn welfare queens and petty criminals piss me off too. i wish I could live on velveeta and $200/mo in a crack infested neighborhood right alongside them. man, that would be sweet, wouldn’t it? to have zero hope, ambition, or dreams? i’m so jealous of them! i wish i could trade places with them. they have it so swell. :|

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  • Mrs Joyce Smith

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  • Mr Bob Diamond

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  • James Graham

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  • Carena T.

    Just remember- when it’s for other people, it’s a ‘social entitlement’. When it’s for you, you ‘deserve it.’ Oh, y’all are so selfish. So pathetic.

  • Carena T.

    I was smarter than you at 15 than you are now. GTFOH

  • Carena T.

    Oh, you mean like the way it is now? Let’s not even discuss how much debt the repub retards saddled our country with. ‘oh! well that’s different, that was for war!’ … and for gov’t kickbacks, and corporate and investment tax loopholes, offshore bank accounts that were “never located”, etc. etc. etc. Don’t come for me unless I send for you.

  • Carena T.

    lol waah? you’re clearly not even reading what I wrote. Your inability to be articulate proves why we need people to go to college. Oh, stupid people. You make me sad for this country.

  • adambreel

    Yeah, I have a degree (A real one) and don’t whine and complain. You sound like the kind of person who got an “ology” degree and now makes 9 dollars and an hour working a job that has nothing to do with your major, but is somehow a smug self-satisfied know it all loser. Had you gotten a real job, you wouldn’t be complaining about your student loans. But don’t worry I’m sure if you ask him really nice, Jon Stewart will pay your loans for you. After all, he made 100 million dollars off of morons like you. Because that’s what it’s all about right, income redistribution? I guess I don’t know what “real” satire is, but I do know the definition of irony- a person who calls someone else inarticulate, that themselves has a demonstrable inability to form proper sentences, use proper grammar or capitalization.



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  • lovethbelson

    Thanks be to God almighty for her kindness and goodness upon my life what will i have done if not for Mrs Linda Lee, who i will always see as a God sent woman who God have chosen to help people who are in financial need like me a poor widow who was short listed and short of funds a woman who have two kids and has so many responsibilities a woman who lost her husband and has bills to pay consisting of both house rent and electricity bills and was scammed the sum of $2,800 usd i never believed that there is still a legit loan company online who still believe that people are in financial problem and are ready to help after been scammed $3,800 i never believed that there is still a legit loan company until i came across a post that was posted by one Mrs Rose on this same forum she explained how she got her loan from Mrs Linda Lee who is the CEO LINDA LEE LOAN FIRM, by then i was having no more option rather than to try my luck for the second time to avoid losing my home(accommodation)so i think about it i came to a conclusion that i should try again so i contacted Mrs Linda Lee via email they attended to me in less than 22hours i applied for a loan sum of $45,000 usd the loan was approved with low interest rate and after the processing i got my loan in my bank account so i want to quickly use this medium opportunity to advise any loan seeker out there to contact Mrs Linda Lee via email….[email protected] she will definitely give you a loan you require without any stress once again thanks be to God for her mercy upon my life..


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  • Mr. Anthony
  • Mrs Crystal Morgan

    Good Day.

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  • bishop cooper
  • Mr Daniel
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  • kevin

    and yet here it is december 2 and im still paying for mine

  • john smith

    Hello people in this forum
    My Name is Dan Anelos ..I never believed in Love Spells or Magics until I met this special spell caster when i contact this man called prophet viky of [email protected] Execute some business..He is really powerful..My wife divorce me with no reason for almost 4 years and i tried all i could to have her back cos i really love her so much but all my effort did not work out.. we met at our early age at the college and we both have feelings for each other and we got married happily for 5 years with no kid and she woke up one morning and she told me she’s going on a divorce..i thought it was a joke and when she came back from work she tender to me a divorce letter and she packed all her loads from my house..i ran mad and i tried all i could to have her back but all did not work out..i was lonely for almost 4 years…So when i told the spell caster what happened he said he will help me and he asked for her full name and her picture..i gave him that..At first i was skeptical but i gave it a try cos have tried so many spell casters and there is no solution…so when he finished with the readings,he got back to me that she’s with a man and that man is the reason why she left me…The spell caster said he will help me with a spell that will surely bring her back.but i never believe all this…he told me i will see a positive result within 3 days..3 days later,she called me herself and came to me apologizing and she told me she will come back to me..I cant believe this,it was like a dream cos i never believe this will work out after trying many spell casters and there is no solution..The spell caster is so powerful and after that he helped me with a pregnancy spell and my wife got pregnant a month later..we are now happy been together again and with lovely kid..This spell caster has really changed my life and i will forever thankful to him..he has helped many friends too with similar problem too and they are happy and thankful to him..This man is indeed the most powerful spell caster have ever experienced in life..Am Posting this to the Forum in case there is anyone who has similar problem and still looking for a way out..you can reach him here: [email protected]… CONTACT THIS GREAT AND POWERFUL SPELL CASTER CALLED prophet viky … HIS EMAIL ADDRES IS :[email protected]… CONTACT HIM NOW AND BE FAST ABOUT IT SO HE CAN ALSO ATTEND TO YOU BECAUSE THE EARLIER YOU CONTACT HIM NOW THE BETTER FOR YOU TO GET QUICK SOLUTION TO ALL YOUR PROBLEMS…

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  • Angel Shining

    Many countries don’t even charge for college education until you get to the Masters level then you start paying….I used to Nanny for Indian people and many others and they told me it was ridiculous all these Americans owe all this money in student loans…..

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  • Donald Bruce

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  • angie

    It was a joke, you know, kinda like Satire is a joke.
    What’s the matter Ron, not GET it? SMH

  • angie

    Wow, Lorelei, I would at least try to fight that. Maybe speak to a lawyer or something. I would think Leukemia would definitely qualify.

  • Carena T.

    Int’l business, economics, and Spanish. One of those is a master’s degree. It’s okay- your cognitive dissonance refuses to allow you to see the fact you’re full of S**T. :)

  • standardloan
  • seJ

    Damn. I am in the same boat, however, my “college” blatantly lied to me about what types of and how many loans that I would be taken out. Halfway through and almost a year latter I found out that it was double what was initially estimated for the FULL coarse! God bless and hopefully things work out for people like us.

  • seJ

    *taking out. H

  • seJ

    Sallie Mae is a corrupt whore. Judgment day will come… someday…

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  • Alex Park
  • shorething32

    this article is awful. All those people mentioned in the top of the article dropped out and don’t have degrees. Stupid idiot Obama!

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  • Mrs Richard Carey

    My Name Is Mrs Richard Carey I want You all To be careful there.nobody can help you here or even suggest how you can get financial help.any answer of a loan lender to your question,you MUST ignore,because they are SCAMS…real SCAMS…i was a victim of which i was ripped thousands of dollars…well thank God for a Lauren Loan firm,I was referred to by my cousin,who is by name,Mr.Robert Paul Of pay day loan firm.They made my life a valuable one,and gave it a meaning.I was approved loan of $90,000.00 USD AND IN 28 HOURS after meeting up to their necessary requirements,my loan was deposited in my bank account.Though I was very nervous with the loan firm at the first place due to my previous bad experiences,especially when the issue of me settling the transfer charges came up,I hold on to my faith due to the fact that my relative referred me,got it cleared,and as God should have it.little did I know that my financial shortcomings has come to a final HALT .If not for that quick referral from a relative of that genuine source ,I would have regretted my total life,because at that point in time I just divorced the father of my daughter,and my daughter (Michael) was faced with a ” between life and death ” situation ..I was faced with her hospital bills and was also faced with foreclosure at my apartment.Details of the GOD SENT and RELIEVING source won’t be disclosed to you for now, for fear of impersonation ( because it has being discovered that some persons are not really in need of financial help,but are there to impersonate real loan lenders through their phone numbers and email accounts,and acting to be them where necessary to those in real need)…I couldn’t comment on your post because it was a public place and I fear you would fall into the hand of all these fraudulent loan officers (even in US) like how they ripped me off.You must be able to convince me real hard,and provide good proofs,before I can give you the full details of this legitimate loan officer..Their charge is very affordable and reliable compare to many out there,their interest rates just 2%,little documentation,and little credit check(irrespective of your credit score,but you MUST have a good and liable income source) His Name is MR TONY HARTON, Feel free to email him at his via Email:[email protected]”and you will be free from scams. thanks as you read the greatest testimony of my life.

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  • Carolina Matlock

    I am Carolina Matlock from Honolulu here in Hawaii USA, if you need a loan then contact Henry Melvin Global Loan Firm cos that is where I got a loan from three weeks ago without credit check and low interest rate of 4% and there was no cosigner, If you need a loan then you can contact them with this email cos I know they can still help you, [email protected]

  • roninmd

    I was aware of the satire. A return of bankruptcy protection however will be needed or the economy will collapse.

  • Dalt

    “Subjective opinion.” Absolutely redundant. Your attempted command of the English language made you look like a fool.

  • http://www.manicfringe.com/ Lucien Gendrot

    Does redundancy make something incorrect?

  • Mrs Derek Sivers,

    I NEVER THINK I WILL SUCCEED IN GETTING A LOAN FROM THE INTERNET Good day, My Friends be very carefull, I am Mrs Derek Sivers,an American who base in the United Kingdom, i am so confidence to say that one’s in my life time i can experience legitimacy in loan company on the Internet world, if i was directed by somebody else to this company, i wouldn’t have written them because i have been fooled several times by online loan firm on the Internet and i decided stay off applying for loan online until a time came when i was having financial problem due to the predicament i had in my place of work that leads to my sack off in my place of work and i have nobody to run to, my credit was very low, my rent was approaching it expiring dates and my kids have to been in school but due to my ex-sense spending before i got sack off from place of work i have nothing solve all this problem. I have no other option than to come online looking for online loan firm that will help me out of my financial problem and i came across a loan firm and i was scammed of 4,500 in my attempt of obtaining a loan from them and i almost committed suicide and i ask my self is the end of my life because i am a dieing mother of 4 kids to take care of, where will i get money to finance their education and pay my bills? all this are the questions that kept running inside my mind and became frustrated in the process of doing that and a words of encouragement came into me instantly saying it is not over yet, keep trying and you will definitely got in touch with your helper very soon and i stood up and said i will give this a last try and if nothing happens that means their is know hope for me any longer. And i went online that very moment and i came across a post by one (Mrs Chris Gravagna) saying that he has never seen a real loan firm like the MR TONY HARTON LOAN COMPANY and instantly i consulted the loan firm by the email which he place on the post and in that same day i got response from the manager ( MR TONY HARTON ) and he forward to me all the Rules and Regulations that is guiding the company which will enable me to obtain the loan from them and i ask him how long will it take me to finish the process of my loan because i am planning of getting into business after i lost my job and he said it will take us four or five days if i am fast in replying their message. I as him, hope i am not going send any money to them because i was told here in my country that i shouldn’t send any money in getting a loan and he replied by saying that it surprise him when i said that because their is no loan firm online who will render service to a loan seeker without him/her paying anything upfront. It sound very hurt to his hearing and he took it as a pain and explained everything to me and when i have a rethink about it i discovered it was true and that was were those false loan firm took advantage in defrauding people of their had earn money and he gave me his words that i should go on with them and he will took me by surprise that they are truly for real and i went on and apply for a business loan of $90,000.00 USD for the duration of 6years and i paid all the charges that are needed to be paid and like he said he is going to surprise me, that was what he did, it was then i knew that there are still real loan company on the internet otherwise i wouldn’t have known. here is the consultation address: [email protected],if you want to consult them for more information


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  • Aejae

    My whole thing is this. I wouldn’t mind paying back my student loans if I had the job that I went to school for to prepare for. If I had a suitable job, I wouldn’t have no problem in paying back my student loans. That’s the point! But since the majority of us can’t obtain the dream that these damn colleges sold, what other choice we got? If Obama still tries to go with this plan, I’ll support him to the fullest! What about all of those damn people who filed for bankruptcy or had a hard time paying off their credit card debt and all of a sudden they seem like they’re doing alright! Why can’t that happen to us?

  • Ben Skirvin

    I’ll get around to paying them, as soon as the DOE gets around to calculating my interest correctly, crediting payments properly, and stop losing track of which of multiple companies they hired to service the loan. All of which think that they are separately owed the same money.

    If you want to see some real humor, try to make a years worth of payments without encountering some major bureaucratic snafu.

  • SBanana

    Dammit, I was REALLY excited about this…funny stuff, though. :P

  • ChatWraithDeux

    it’s a bad attempt at satire. it’s a fake article.

  • ChatWraithDeux

    To daily currant,
    1) I know you’re trying to be satirical, and you started off that way…but then you just got offensive and it wasn’t funny at all. Satirizing gender studies and sociology makes no sense at all unless you’re some kind of hick who lives under a rock.
    2) I take it you have no idea how much graduates are struggling with debt? We went to college because we hoped that it’d better our chances of getting good paying jobs – jobs that not only would allow us to pay back the money we borrowed but help us have families and lives of our own. The fact that interest rates and education costs have skyrocketed have basically negated the entire effort, and for all that, some asshole journalist has the balls to poke a stick at the people who are already down.

    fuck off, daily currant.

  • irishrose4583

    hahaha Ryan Howard and his wife Kelly from Scranton! so glad those crazy kids made it:) MIss the Office…..

  • ChatWraithDeux

    it’s not real dude. it’s a fake article.

  • ChatWraithDeux

    guessing you didn’t go to college. You’re an ignoramus, and this is a satirical article.

  • Marrice Pedroso

    fuck yeah this couldnt come at a better time. Thank you Mr America (Mr. Obama) i better go get another before this goes through hahaha

  • biscuited

    We are already a socialist state. Just saying what everyone else is afraid to say and accept in there head.

  • Johnny Kern

    Obama misspoke again. Bill Gates did not receive a college diploma. He quit before graduation to start Microsoft.

  • Rocky Rococo

    Strangely you really are clueless to the real situation. You appear to have gotten a “cheap” degree long ago.

  • Rocky Rococo

    You seem to have a rather jilted view of this. You seem to lack the value knowledge and the ability to systematically complete an in depth study through completeion. Sorry you never got yours as it is obvious you never got a degree. But I hope you feel better. It is sad knowing that you have wondered and pondered what would you have been if I had gotten a degree. Well, you didn’t, so go somewhere and retire soon. Maybe take some basket weaving at the local Jr Collage and impress yourself. This should be all you need. Bless your little heart.

  • Rocky Rococo

    So your a hooker at the Ranch topless bar? Wow thanks for your enlightening comments. What ya gonna do after 35? Marry a rich drunk? Good luck with that honey.

  • Rocky Rococo

    Maybe these institutions should have been monitored and audited by the state and federal government.

  • Rocky Rococo

    Then you would bankrupt the entire higher education system. I’m convenience now your not an MD of anything. Your a con and a liar and you do this cause you are super insecure and play games behind the internet to make yourself feel important or cleaver. Busted! And I’m now laughing at you knowing that your life will be what it is now for the rest of your life. Your a pathetic old troll.

  • Rocky Rococo

    How what great empowering BS. You must work in financial aid.

  • sdickinson20

    Am I the only one that believes when you borrow money you are supposed to pay it back??? Rediculous!

  • its2012getoverit

    So to those believing this article is real. The date is April 2013, the plan was “supposed” to go into effect November 1. I don’t know about y’all but I’m still being automatically deducted on my student loan payments…

  • Christine Austin

    thank god for OBOMA i like what hes doing would like him to do more especilly with immagration and deportion that will be nice also

  • Jessinikkip

    There are things I wish so very hard were true, and this is one of them. But I cracked up at “Where would successful people like Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Tom Hanks, Brad Pitt or Mark Zuckerberg be without their college diplomas?”

  • ejb

    Lifelongdebtor, I’ve done a lot of independent research on filing for bankruptcy. There are certain cases where student debt can be discharged when they were for a non accredited institution. I’m not a professional or anything, but take a look at these links and maybe you can get some relief! Best of luck!
    a link to check to see if your school is on this list or not

  • Bob Wang

    If that was true, I would vote for Obama for my 3rd time. If not, I am once again disappointed with the only candidate running for America. I wish there was another candidate running for presidency.

  • Jenny Yasi

    Oh rats, it seemed like such a great idea.

  • Robotech_Master

    I’ll be honest: the satire in this article is so low-key that if I hadn’t already known the Daily Currant was a satire site, I probably would have taken it seriously myself. (Which is sad, as I have a big chunk of student loan debt I’d love to shed.)

  • Dude

    I know this is satire, but it’s pretty mean-spirited towards those who have taken on student loans. The very idea that you should have to pay for education at all is not universal. Here is a list of countries where college is free:


  • Teri Coley Adams

    total satire..

  • Theresa

    I hope this is true! My student loan is holding me back. Can’t get a loan for house because I’m behind ion my student loan. Two kids and medical bills. On top of that other bills. It’s hard to take 100.00 a month or more just, to make a loan payment. Then have to scramble to get other bills paid. I hope this goes through.

  • Wes

    I think everyone who believes this is real, and is excited for this, should be taken out back and shot.

  • veronica

    im getting out of this country as fast i can using money we dont have when does it stop were done with

  • StephenWV

    #1 Bill gates dropped out of college.

    #2 He now creates a law by-passing Congress that creates tax payer funded free college education?

    #3 I guess all those doctors with all their college loans to pay back will need help as Obamacare reduces their payments to next to nothing.

    #4 As the CBO said, Obamacare will eliminate 2.5 million jobs, college grads would have an even harder time finding work than they do now thanks to Obama killing coal jobs and preventing oil drilling and pipeline jobs.

    #5 now after having to pay higher healthcare premiums, deductibles, and copays, we will be expected to further reduce our income with more taxes to pay this illegal law.

    I guess this is a great way for Obama to buy students’ votes for the Democrat running in November. “Vote for the candidate that will give you the most from the taxpayers.”

    As Alexis de Tocqueville said: “The American Republic will endure until the day Congress discovers that it can bribe the public with the public’s money.” We are well along this path and Obama is widening it.

  • Jack Smith

    I only took courses in college. I thought taking coarses would be too tough.

  • Jack Smith

    The article is fake. If you actually believe this article to be true… maybe the reason you don’t have a good paying job is sitting between the chair and the keyboard.

  • l

    where is the responsibility is you are not accountable to pay your debt. why jeopardize the county by adding even more to the deficit? we need intelligence leading this country not ignorance!

  • Zach

    Or “A Modest Proposal” By William Taft.

  • dacaria

    I think you meant by Jonathan Swift, but yes, A Modest Proposal, is a perfect example of Juvenalian Satire.

  • Brittany E Dubbs

    exactly..whats so funny about this?

  • Bill Machelor

    you really got em rankled ! Some of these “college grads” needed to take “Learn to laugh at yourself 101″ while in school.

  • captain_pudding

    Maybe someone intelligent enough to know they’re reading a joke article on a comedy website?

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  • http://rachelpatton84.wordpress.com Rachel Patton

    In my opinion this was a very sensible move on Obama’s part, the ever rising educational cost is no wonder a concern for students not just in America but in other parts of the world too. For instance cost of GCC is highest in UAE according to a report (http://www.freenewspos.com/english/community-bridge-article/1493/uae-being-declared-the-most-expensive-country-for-gcc) . In such a condition the steps taken by president Obama are a sigh of relief for many!

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    If you don’t know nothing is for free, please don’t bother going to college.

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  • ytg137

    Link for new federal loan program for students starting school in 2014 http://www.whitehouse.gov/issues/education/higher-education/ensuring-that-student-loans-are-affordable.

    No immediate forgiveness for existing loans. This article is a hoax.

  • ytg137


  • ytg137

    it’s a hoax

  • ytg137

    don’t worry, it’s a hoax

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