Politics

Former Congressman Anthony Weiner tried to put his past behind him today by colorfully making light of the scandal which removed him from office.

In an interview with WNBC's local news this morning, the potential mayoral candidate said he has moved beyond his sexting drama and the only "hard-on" he has now is for New York City.... Read More →

Sarah Palin called for the invasion of the Czech Republic today in response to the recent terrorist attacks in Boston.

In an interview with Fox News, the former governor of Alaska said that although federal investigators have yet to complete their work, the time for action is now.... Read More →

CNN reported that President Barack Obama resigned today.

Correspondent John King took to the airwaves this morning to explain an email from White House press secretary Jay Carney saying Barack Obama had quit over "budget issues."... Read More →

Authorities in New Zealand are struggling to contain a burdgeoning epidemic of beastiality unleashed by its recent legalization of gay marriage.

According to police in cities across the country, thousands of people descended on sheep farms and began sexually penetrating the animals almost instantly after parliament voted for marriage equality yesterday.... Read More →

Senator Ted Cruz introduced a bill today to ban government employees from listening to rapper Jay-Z's music.

In a speech on the Senate floor, the Texas Republican, who is of Cuban descent, said Jay-Z's recent rip to Cuba with his wife Beyoncé was "an unconscionable act of treason" and should be punished severely.... Read More →

Former U.S. President George W. Bush has challenged North Korea’s government and military to “Bring it on” and face the wrath of the United States, echoing a similar challenge he made to militants during the Iraq War.

Bush’s comment comes amid increased tension on the Korean peninsula, as the North Korean government has prepared more tests of its nuclear and ballistic missile program while making aggressive threats against the United States, South Korea and Japan.... Read More →

North Korea escalated its feud with the United States today by declaring it will negotiate with America only if it sends former NBA star Michael Jordan as its representative.

The bizarre request will likely add to the already dangerous uncertainty surrounding the intentions of the North Korean regime - which has heavily increased its threats against the U.S. and South Korea in recent weeks. ... Read More →

In an effort to reduce the taxpayer cost of Margaret Thatcher's funeral, American beverage company Coca-Cola and six other large corporations have been named official sponsors of the event.

In a statement released to the press this morning, Maria Miller - the British Secretary of State for Culture, Media and Sport - explained that each sponsor will pay £1.4 million for the exclusive rights to advertise their products during the procession.... Read More →

The U.S. Congress announced today it has managed to cut an additional $100 million in wasteful government programs from the federal budget, and then promptly gave itself a raise exactly equal to the amount cut.

In a joint press conference, Democratic and Republican leaders hailed the cuts as a sign of “fiscal responsibility and bipartisanship” in their ongoing efforts to reduce the nation’s $16.6 trillion debt, despite the gridlock and partisan warfare that has characterized budget negotiations for the past several months.... Read More →

Rep. Paul Ryan refused to tip an elderly waiter today at a Washington-area soul food restaurant.

According to witnesses at Auntie Ruth's Bistro in Northeast D.C., Ryan stiffed his server on the grounds of "personal austerity" and proceeded to tell the 72-year-old man to "get a real job."... Read More →

Barack Obama said today that France has "by far the hottest" first lady of any major country in the world.

In an interview with French magazine Paris Match, the U.S. president praised the "astounding" physical attractiveness of Valérie Trierweiler, the domestic partner of French President François Hollande.... Read More →

Iran's President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad blamed Jews today for the "global scourge of erectile dysfunction."

In a speech broadcast on state television, the Islamic firebrand claimed an international Jewish cabal is provoking male impotence though chemicals in bottled water and then making billions by treating the syndrome with pharmaceutical drugs like Viagra.... Read More →