Scientists and politicians the world over were stunned today to learn that the fringe conspiracy theory which holds that global climate change is a hoax perpetrated by scientists, European governments, and the alternative energy industry turns out to be true.

The office of the United States Attorney for the District of Columbia announced this morning in Washington D.C. the arrest and indictments of 378 people connected to a decades-long effort to convince the global public that Earth's temperature was warming and that human emissions of greenhouse gases were the cause. The scheme was hatched in the early 1980's and aimed to profit from shares connected to companies involved in the alternative energy business - especially manufacturers of solar panels such as the bankrupt firm Solyndra.... Read More →


Entourage co-creator and showrunner Doug Ellin is in talks with several television production studios to develop a workplace comedy about four lifelong friends who work at a Beverly Hills Maserati dealership, The Daily Currant can reveal.

Refusing to rest on his laurels after the mega-successful run of Entourage on HBO, Ellin has been busy developing new comedy series for the premium network under an overall deal with his Fly The Coop production company.... Read More →


Amidst the furor of a potential referendum on Scottish independence, an investigation by The Daily Currant can reveal that the English region of Cornwall left the United Kingdom in 2004 and has been an indepdnent country now for nearly 6 years.

The revelation has sparked curiosity amongst the British public - many of whom had never known the former Celctic kingdom which was incorprated into England in the 11th century had ever been part of the U.K. at all. ... Read More →


America was stunned today to learn that several of that nation's top media personalities from its two highest rated twenty-four hour news networks have been killed during a charity sporting event meant to raise money for sick children.

Newsanchors from the left-leaning MSNBC network and the right-leaning Fox News Channel met yesterday in New York's Central Park for the 5th Annual Swing for the Cure event sponsored by the National Alliance for Childhood Leukemia (NACL). ... Read More →


Yesterday the U.S. state of North Carolina overwhelmingly passed a referendum which extended that state's already existent ban on gay marriage into the its constitution - making it the 30th state in America to do so.

Today the Alliance of North Carolina Divorce Attorneys (ANCDA) announced that it will be accepting donations for an emergency relief fund designed to cushion the financial impact of  the measure - known as Amendment One  - on its members and their families.... Read More →


Lindsay Lohan, the former Hollywood actress turned celebutante sans égal, has shocked the gossip columns and the celebrity blogsophere by making yet another bad decision.

The 25 year old professional substance abuser has reportedly been apprehended by Santa Monica police after driving her black Mercedes Gelandewagen down a pedestrian-only boulevard on the city's famed 3rd Street Promenade in pursuit of a man dressed in a black rabbit costume. ... Read More →


Don't Call it LoveThe People's Republic of China announced today that is has arrested a young blogger for  "anti-revolution" and "dissident" activities.  Zhū Yǔnwén (朱允炆), a 12 year old from outside Beijing, is accused of inciding sympathies for the Taiwanese and American governments though his posts on Twitter-like microblogging site Weibo and the social networking site Ren-Ren.... Read More →


Murderers from around the United States have been flocking to the state of North Dakota to escape the threat of the death penalty, The Daily Currant can reveal. Lured by the prospect of being able to murder without being killed themselves, several thousand ordinary Americans who simply want to kill someone have set up camp in this flat, isolated Upper Midwestern state and are expected to target their victims in the coming months.

The United States is the only Western country which retains the death penalty and with 43 executions is ranked 5th - behind China, Iran, Saudi Arabia, and Iraq - in the total number performed last year. Yemen and North Korea were 6th and 7th, respectively.... Read More →


Matt Drudge - the conservative American political blogger who runs the popular website The Drudge Report -  has been awarded an honorary Webby award for "Lifetime Achievement in Web Design Conservation and Consistency".

The Drudge Report started in 1997 and is most famous for breaking the Monica Lewinsky scandal the following year when America's mainstream press refused to publish the story. In fifteen years it has become a significant force in American journalism and is currently ranked by Alexa as the 426th most popular website on the Internet averaging around 6.5 million pageviews a day.... Read More →


The world's biggest global macro hedge funds are working on plan to collapse the Danish economy sometime in 2013 by provoking an abrupt and uncontrolled rise of the Scandinavian country's currency against the Euro and U.S. Dollar.

Denmark is a member of the European Union, but like the U.K. or Sweeden it does not use the Euro. However the country's currency - the Danish Krone - is pegged to the Euro in an exchange rate mechanism dating from the Euro's institution in 1999. ... Read More →


The brightest lights in the international drug trafficking industry fêted their own last night at the star-studded Druggie awards in Panama City, Panama. The 3rd annual award show celebrated excellence and achievement in the field of global drug crime.

The notoriously territorial drug cartels put their differences aside once a year to celebrate the shared spoils of their $300 billion a year industry. Although the night's statuettes were widely spread between Latin American cocaine cartels and Old World heroin runners, the biggest star of the night was perhaps the U.S. government - whose opposition to sensible drug laws make brutal global drug syndicates possible.... Read More →


The Kingdom of Saudi Arabia announced today that it was leaning towards taking a step forward for women's rights and finally allow its female population to use forks. The highly anticipated move comes as the autocratic Islamic regime faces calls to be banned from the 2012 Olympic Games in London over its refusal to field women athletes and ongoing criticism around the world for its overall record on women's rights.

A spokesperson for the Saudi government says "We hope this gesture of goodwill today will assure our critics that the Kingdom is open to reform on all issues and is sensitive to the needs of its female population."

... Read More →